23 May 2010


Savonarola was burned at the stake in 1498.  The Netherlands declared independence from Spain in 1568.  The Second Defenestration of Prague occurred in 1618 and Cyrill Demian received a patent for the accordian in 1829.

Born today:  Elias Ashmole (1617-1692), Carolus Linnaeus (1707-1778), Franz Anton Mesmer (1737-1815), Douglas Fairbanks (1883-1939), Scatman Crothers (1910-1986), Rosemary Clooney (1928-2002), Nigel Davenport (1928), Joan Collins (1933), Robert Moog (1934), John Newcombe (1944), Luka Bloom (1955), Jimmy McShane (1957-1995) and, if my memory serves me, the lovely and talented Mr. Terry Hall's older son, Felix, is turning 22 today.  Somewhere here abouts, anyway.  How I know that is not nearly as stalkerish as it sounds.

It is World Turtle Day.


  1. Since the last time my identity on CiF was exposed by that stalwart of free speech BeautifulBurnout which resulted in yet another ban for me, I've been posting as Licentialiquendi.

    So now that darling of CiF Ally Fogg has joined MrsB in the role of censor. Here he is today about me challenging his misuse of a report in The Sun of all rags, to back up his defence of allowing men accused of raping women to have anonymity:

    "They are not case studies, they are newspaper reports. I linked to the first newspapers that came up from google, but if you don't believe The Sun, here's another."

    ""I'd like to link to a nice liberal lefty source like the Guardian, but as we both know (we've been here before, Bitey) the Guardian has a strict policy of never reporting cases of false rape allegations, even when they are proved beyond all reasonable doubt and lead to such horrific, fatal consequences."

    Now there's only one reason for Mr Fogg identifying me and that's to prevent him being criticised. So let's hear no more from him about being a champion of liberty, as when his back's against the wall he'll be as dictatorial as those he claims to despise.

  2. Since I used Crabman & Mr. Turtle today, maybe you'd like to see one of my favourite commercials, ever.

  3. Montana

    That ad is bloody hilarious!


    Don't know which thread you're referring to, but does it never occur to you that you out yourself on CiF?

  4. Apols if I went off at NapK at the deep end last night...

    Love the Crabman ;) love Earl too!

  5. Morning all

    Piss off Bitey

    You out yourself every time by your posting style and your very distinctive trademark ad homs.

    If you stopped behaving like a creep nobody would notice you. But you can't resist playing the man instead of the ball and attacking commenters by trawling through your Million Dollar Brain database and pulling up stuff from months or years ago to try and smear them. It is stalkerish and offensive.

    I have no idea what you posted or where. I imagine it is probably on the Bindel thread. And frankly I am so past being interested in what you have to say that it isn't even funny.

    But if you resort to ad hom you should expect people to report it. (I know I expect to be zapped if I have made a personal attack on someone, and I am usually surprised if the comment is still there the next day.)

    And given that you have been banned so many times now, I am pretty sure that if any one of your posts gets reported they can spot your slimy style a mile off and ban you for transgressing the "no multiple nicks" rule.

    I don't know why I am wasting my time actually because you are too arrogant to take any notice of anything anyone else has to say to you. But if you tried being less of a stalker I am sure your current nick would live a long and happy life.

  6. Oh and it wasn't me who outed you as Jiasa.

  7. Morning All

    BB: The lad's father lasted till past five, when he listened to reason and agreed to go to bed. He's up already.

  8. medve

    I trust you have a nice exhausting day planned for the lad? But then again, perhaps not - they have a lot more energy than we do!

  9. Morning all - apologies for recent silence, have friends staying. Off to the beach later! Where it will probably be not as hot as it looks....

  10. Medve - blimey!

    Well I eventually crashed at two but was awake like clockwork at 7, which seems to be my normal walking time these days no matter what, so I am feeling a tad frayed round the edges. Husband making me toast and gooseberry jam. Yum.

  11. Philippa

    I am off to the land of frogs next weekend, but I don't think the weather is going to hold, according to the long range forecast. Sigh.

  12. Oh and it wasn't me who outed you as Jiasa

    BB, I've already told bitey that it was me who reported jiasa for abuse and informed Cif about his banning as bitethehand. Whether that got jiasa deleted, I don't know, but I really hope so. I don't know why he keeps on blaming you. As for all his other nicks, I've no idea who reports him but I imagine many ciffers are familiar with his distinctive and very personal misogynism. He's a sensitive soul though, and it's a shame that his worthwhile contributions to Cif are so often silenced by the opponents of free speech.

  13. wouldn't worry about it, BB, all the weather reports since I've got back have said, "ooh, maybe 19 degrees, bit cloudy" in advance, and then had to repost as "24, clear skies, v sunny" on the day in question...

  14. scherf

    I was just looking at the comment that might have jogged Ally into outing him and it is classic bitey all the way.

    The first bit:

    "AllyF gets 70 recommends for posting two highly dubious 'case studies' to back up his defence of rapists. In one report in that bastion of ethical journalism The Sun, an 82 year old with serious physical and mental health problems, walks into the sea to drown himself. In the other the man with a history of alcoholism is the victim of someone who has an intense grudge against him, but appears not to have been arrested for anything, let alone rape."

    So far so good. Nothing wrong with that. A bit sarky maybe, but perfectly reasonable.

    But he can't leave it at that, can he? Oh no. He has to add:

    "And this from the man whose so very keen on criticising writers for their misuse of statistics."

    He just doesn't get it, does he?

    And another personal pop at Ally on another thread yesterday:


    I was just about reconciled to mass poverty, unemployment, slashed public services and a tory government. Now you're saying I might have to cope with a new Martin Amis as well?

    Well apart from the Amis thing, I thought that helping the rest was what you made your living from?

    Some reconciliation?

    Anybody reading that who has been around for a while would know it's bitey.

  15. Plus - have just been reading the obesity thread, and annetan, great stuff.

    Stress was the thing for me, too (and working conditions) - despite relocating to the land of cheese and wine, I've lost 2.5 stone since getting here about 2 years ago, mainly because a) I have the time and energy to cook rather than buy meals, and b) i ain't stressed any more.

  16. Seconded re Annetan's comments - just been reading that thread myself.

    Anne, when you are around later, I shouldn't worry about thfc's jibes - the man is a bigot, posting similarly nasty stuff on immigration threads too.

    Philippa - I put on all my weight when I moved back to the UK from France. Fair enough, I had a baby in that time too, but I find I eat and drink more when I am over there but still manage to lose weight. The French diet is much better for you.

  17. BW/medve - class contributions to UT last night, thoroughly enjoyed them.

    BB - have you thought about intoxication as a lure for the 'fugitive' rat?

    Rumour has it that a drunk rat cannot differentiate 'tween a tortoise/turtle/female rat.

    Thus helpful suggestion number two:

    i)spike his drinking water with real ale

    ii) borrow a a rat sized and obliging female turtle/tortoise from a neighbour

    iii) buy her some nice earnings (to which a piece of string can be gently attached)

    iv) forget the lipstick

    v) consult Bitterweed on mood music

    vi) fit the earrings and light string and send her in.....

    vii) gently tug on her earring string when appropriate

    viii) don't take photographs (your rat will be embarrassed and may not later be forgiving)

    ix) don't tell the RSPCA of your plan

    (x) (fingers crossed - keep us posted)

    Dog walking on a stunning day calls.

    I would hate to become a joke statistic for the NHS. Happily I have a capacity to learn from mistakes thus this year I don't intend to get sunburn on the bum whilst walking the dogs without kecks.

  18. Really excellent posts on the obesity thread Anne, I normally avoid those threads (for obvious reasons) but I thought I would chance it and see what you had to say and I am glad I did.

    Ben2 also made some great posts.

  19. "....Wenlock, named after the Shropshire site of Britain's first Olympic revival,..."

    Used to live in the next village to Much Wenlock and many a fine sunny Sunday have I rolled around the pubs of Much Wenlock dreaming of being an Olympian......

  20. deano: Thanks for your kind words despite my suspicions of your ulterior motives for not drinking last night ;-)

  21. BB:

    Just wondering. It is clear now why your French is so good, but i know that you have a fair bit of Dutch as well. Does German complete the set? I'm going to have to learn some more new languages in a desperate effort to stay ahead!

  22. Sorry to bring gloom on such a lovely day but just seen this sad little story that has largely stayed under the radar but is emblematic of the vile times we live in.

    A half century of culture lost

  23. Hey Deano, Medve, Sheff!

    Beautiful day indeed.

    Medve, I only know a little dutch because I have friends in Holland and Belgium from whom I pick up bits and bobs of phrases, but really not much.

    I did german at school but I can't really remember much of it. So french is really my only other language.

    Sheff - that really is sad. The whole country has been destroyed and pillaged. I was furious when I found out that the US had set up a base on an archeological site and were using bits of "old pots" for target practice when they first moved in.

    Deano - I don't thing it would do Freddie any good at all to get him drunk, bless him. I am already frightened he might end up as a tasty lunch for a passing moggy.... Carbonade de Rat or Rat au Vin might tempt them even more

  24. BB

    I found out that the US had set up a base on an archeological site and were using bits of "old pots" for target practice when they first moved in.

    They set up camp at Babylon - one of the most ancient and important archeological sites in the world - drove all over it in their bloody armoured vehicles - thoroughly trashed it - and then they accuse the Iraqi's of being barbarians.

  25. To compensate for Sheff's sad one:

    An interesting even joyful read.

    I always did like CP folk.

    Erm - Rat au Vin , tricky that one BB. Will have to give some thought to helpful suggestion number three.

  26. BB, Anne,

    thfc666, or whatever he's called, is quite something, ain't he?

    I usually found that his righteous indignation on a given topic is inversely proportional to his actual understanding of it though....

  27. James - a delightful assemblage of words which I like very much:

    "..I usually found that his righteous indignation on a given topic is inversely proportional to his actual understanding of it though...."

    Makes the perfect basis for a definition of the word tosser. Class.

  28. James - he hangs about on the immigration threads a lot, and spouts nonsense.

  29. I think the last time I engaged with him, he said something like:

    'all smokers deserve the pain and blah, blah...
    Each smoker is a selfish, disgusting, weak excuse for a human...
    If I had my way, everytime somebody lit up, anywhere, they should at the very least, be punched in the face, etc.....
    ......my wife smokes'

    I genuinely wondered whether I should perhaps contact help on his wife's behalf....

    Truly a rather angry, odious man!!

  30. BB

    Helpful suggestion number three - Part One.

    Helpful suggestion number three - Part Two.

    Please to note that this is not a lethal solution.

    It may be a tad difficult to get the mood music right but nothing ventured, Freddie not gained.

    Tell the man in the shop you want the odour (bait) that is reminiscent of the scent of a fine lady rat in stiletto heels.

    I don't normally approve of commercial solutions to matters of passion, but the fact is you have a young person in the throes of a home education. His education must be taken into account.

    Do remember to point out that this would not have happened if he had got a Red Setter as advised..

  31. A fabulous Swift just chased an insect through the awning and into the open door of my van before turning on a farthing and flying away.

    No more than two feet from my face. I've never seen one that close up.

    Magic. The eye of a Swift on the wing is quite something.

  32. Sounds magical Deano!

    I don't think I will bother with rat bait, though. Just wafting some meat about ought to do the trick.

  33. Afternoon all

    ''Truly a rather angry, odious man!!''

    I am on an anger-management course and am reading a
    book called 'How to make friends and influence people'.

    Bear with me people!

    It that doesn,t work there,s always prozac!

    @Montana :-)

  34. Sheff et al - I would appreciate an opinion....

    You may recall a discussion some time last summer when we talked of the perfect 'bench', both for the casting of 'Furnivall the film' and as a suitable repose for a travelling tramp with imagination....

    True that I have not yet won the Euro lottery to fund the extravagance but my attention alighted on this:

    The ultimate Tramp's bench

    An open question arises - what would a lady do if she awoke to find a tramp asleep on the likes of this bench on her lawn.....

    i) call the police

    ii) invite the tramp in for breakfast.

  35. Paul,

    that's a joke, right!?

    I know you're a spurs supporter, but ........

  36. Ah, thfc. As I recall, he was one of the men who was apoplectic about my 2nd ATL piece -- seemed to think that by not wanting my son to play with toy guns, I was a man-hater who was denying my son his birthright. In fact, I think he might have been the one to suggest that it would improve the world and serve me right if my son one day got ahold of a real gun and shot me.

  37. Blimey, Montana, was that him?

    Charming fellow, isn't he?

  38. "...the one to suggest that it would improve the world and serve me right if my son one day got ahold of a real gun and shot me."

    Ye fucking God's - what you have to put up with for your art!

    Good to see that you again have a little time to comment on your own blog Montana

    Hope that you too are having some agreeable weather in Cowpat Junction..

    Well that's me phone internet allowance almost used up too - just enough left to read UT once a day till the end of the month.

    Regards all - see you next month.

  39. Ought to say that barley heads are just coming through the stalks in the field outside - thus as I write it's a palette of a dozen different shades of green.

    A few more days sunshine and they'll quickly yellow and then droop to finally ripen and dance in the breeze. My favourite field crop.

    lots to look forward to...

  40. All the best deano!

    See you on the other side.....

  41. James

    ''that's a joke, right!?''

    Yep albeit not one of me best!

    The Spurs jibe i will tactfully ignore.I do however
    understand why you felt the need to emigrate to
    Brazil to see some decent footie.Supporting Darlington
    FC all your life was a thankless task.And switching
    your allegiances to a much better GB club -like Spurs- can be a bit awkward.

    It,s a guy thing-i understand :-)

  42. Paul,

    Don't get me wrong, it wasn't a jibe, I was just saying that other than that one fact, I couldn't see any similarities....

    The footie here's actually a bit rubbish. Not least because most of the players take a dive if someone in row z sneezes. It gets a bit tiresome after a while.

    Supporting my Brazilian team is considerably more frustrating than my English one. Specially when they go with the 1-1-1-3-1-2-1 formation....

  43. James

    ''Don't get me wrong, it wasn't a jibe, I was just saying that other than that one fact, I couldn't see any similarities....''

    Didn,t take it as a jibe-just normal healthy banter.
    Methinks i need to be more careful how i write things
    in cyber so people don,t read me incorrectly.Very
    easy to do when you don,t know people.Hope all,s
    good with you in the Land of Pele.

  44. Hmm. My first attempt to post this has disappeared.

    Re: thfc (the horrendous fecking C). You remember correctly Montana. I grassed on him by reporting his comment as a "legal problem": incitement to murder.

  45. Paul,

    tis a bit hard to do the irony tone online, I agree.
    (I was probably a bit over cautious after the 'hoary fox' incident in t'supermarket the other day......)


  46. Also, I'm not sure why my comical formation whatsit has come up as a link.

    Probably best not to click on that folks.....

  47. Yey, I've been allowed out for a coffee....

    Catch you all in a bit....

  48. Ah, Medve! I'm gratified to know that my memory isn't completely off. It was hard to be sure -- there were so many men on that thread who didn't seem to be able to grasp my intentions or pick up on the fact that I was talking about an opinion I had shed about 8 years ago.

    Now can you answer a technical question for me? Down in the lower right hand corner of my screen, where those little icons are for things like Messenger, iTunes, etc. there is one for Adobe Reader that pops up with a little bubble about every half hour or so saying "Update is ready to install. Click here for information." However, when I click on the icon, nothing happens. This has been going on for several days. I tried opening Adobe Reader, thinking maybe that would bring up an update dialog box, but no. It just opened Adobe Reader. How the hell do I get rid of this thing? It's really irritating.

  49. Montana: windoze XP? I know very little about that being a Linux pervert, but my larger son is quite up to speed, as is the neighbour. Will go off and ask advice, back in a trice.

  50. Haven't yet read a thing from the past 2 days, but here's a song (with Dobro - I think) for Bitterweed: You are ahead by a century. Had been having an all-Canadian music weekend.

    And I am prompted to mention that the Cardiff Blues won the Amlin Cup!

  51. Right. Assuming we are talking about Adobe Acrobat (pdf) reader. You will need to know whether you have Service Pack 2 or (better) Service Pack 3 installed on your windoze.

  52. Just finished a very exciting essay about enzymes, just some very boring graphs and stats to do before Tuesday now, when will I ever learn not to leave things to the last minute.

    I am watching Rocky at the same time, I used to think it was one of my favourite popcorn films and it still has it moments but all the stuff with Adriane was very uncomfortable to watch.

  53. Montana: The advice i have been given for you is to download the reader from http://get.adobe.com/reader/, because that page is quite smart at figuring out your operating system details. It is quite a large download (hope you have the bandwidth). Installing it should cure your problem, which is probably caused by the updater crashing. A safer solution would be to first un-install Adobe Reader, but both son and neighbour say that you should try the simpler option (no guarantees).

  54. Montana: I have tried to organise this confusion into an email message heading for your Inbox.

  55. Bitey.
    I'm sorry me old chum but I'm sure AllyF is far too important to give a fuck what you think.

    Those are the breaks I guess.

  56. Bitterweed: That was some cyber-gig we had last night.

  57. Thanks Thauma.

    It's been a while since I posted or looked at CiF, but I remember thfc being a bit of a one trick right wing headbanger. I'm sure he lives with his mum in Croydon, watches EDL videos and has an immitation gun that he hides in a shoebox. I'd put money on it.

  58. PS I have the worst hangover in human memory and am going for a lie down. Teach me to not eat all day yesterday. I feel like the human embodiment of Broken Britain and want my mother.

  59. medve
    We rocked dude ! Paying the price today though. Shit...

  60. BW

    You have my sympathies, mate. I was bleary eyed this morning although I am a lot better now.

    Hope you recover by the morning! x

  61. Some more Canadian music

    Been hanging round gas stations.

    Other selections include the divine Sarah, Daniel Lanois (who unfortunately doesn't have anything decent on YouTube), Robbie Robertson / The Band and of course Sir Cohen.

  62. Thauma,

    I'm having YouTube issues, but 'ahead by a century' reminds me of good times in Canada, and if the devine Sarah = Ms McLachlan, that's a damn good call too!!

  63. Damn right, James!

    Here's some non-Canadian music just cos it popped into my head: Don't look at the carpet.

  64. Evening all

    A gem from cif-

    ''east europeans come to Britain and get a better
    standard of living on wages most British people
    consider to be rubbish-(or words to that effect)''

    No they fcuking don,t shithead-they too often are
    exploited in minimum wage jobs and live in the most
    squalid,overcrowded dickensian conditions so they
    can some of their paltry wages back home to their

    Cif really need to acquire a filter that can prevent
    the extremely stupid from posting over there.Yes i
    know freedom of speech and all that.But this isn,t
    me just disagreeing with a view it,s actually me
    despairing at how unthinking some people are.

  65. Been away again, so, have I missed much here (or indeed on CiF) over the past 4-5 days? Any great posts, flaming rows, falling-outs/make-ups, "car-crash" articles, or comedic gems?

  66. Paul - nice piece of myth-busting.

    Alisdair - dunno. Been absent also!

    About to absent myself again ... dog needs walk now it's cooled down....

  67. thauma

    Stunning from the get go.

  68. Alisdair,

    arguably, you've missed at least a bit of all of the above, although probably nothing above and beyond normal UT parameters!!

  69. When s/he,s on form Melissa Darley could quite
    easily make me piss myself laughing.

    That,s me condemned to hell,n,damnation for my

    Personally i blame me Catholic upbringing!

  70. BeautifulBurnout said...
    Oh and it wasn't me who outed you as Jiasa.
    23 May, 2010 09:00

    More short term memory problems Mrs B?

    From CiF:

    What do you want to talk about?
    beautifulburnout's comment 17 Mar 10, 10:59pm

    Jiasa aka BiteTheHand aka Auxesis aka IsItJob

  71. And someone else had outed you before that too, which is how I knew it was you... dork.

  72. Hey Alasdair - long time no see. x

  73. @Paul - your instincts are spot on and your heart is in the right place. I read through yesterday's little kick-fest and felt, like you did, that the grown ups should really have exercised a bit of restraint.

    For whatever reason, Montana's got a proper gob on her at the moment. Who knows why? Who cares? I've lost interest in Montana's "poor liddle ol' me" act. Fuck it, Montana, if it's as bad as all that, sell the critters and get a boat to Venezuela.

    More to the point, though, Paul, when I passed by a few weeks ago I passed on the news that NapK had called me, and my judgement was that he needed kid gloves, a bit of understanding etc. NapK's clearly a very sensitive young man, with the emphasis on "young". He's 21 ffs, he's a boy. I haven't read all he's had to say on here the last few weeks and I'm sure that lots of what he's had to say has been bollocks, obnoxious and objectionable.

    But how does it help a fucked up 21-year-old to bully him?

    Let's be fucking frank about this, there's plenty of guys who constantly talk bollocks on here.

    One of the reasons I started giving this site a swerve was deano's self-indulgent meanderings, where he only returned to tumescence when a female poster passed through.

    We all agreed tacitly to ignore deano's sad old fart flirting. How much more objectionable to our sensibilities was NapK's juvenile fumblings?

    The sad thing is that deano was treated as part of the gang, so his drivel was indulged.

    And that says so much about what this blog is for - it's not really a place for debate, or dissent, or controversy. It's just a place to hang out.

  74. Reading that back again, it's all about deano.

    That's harsh about deano. The truth is that it's not all about him. The point is that there's others on here who are indulged despite the fact that they either (A)say nothing worth saying (B) say lots but it's all bollocks or (C) are just, you know, like really nice.

    Or (D) they could be habib, who hangs around to delete posts, like they never existed, despite the fact that doing so violates the founding principles of this place.

    This post will be deleted in 5, 4, 3, 2...

  75. Bittette, old fruit, be a good chap, and spout your twaddle elsewhere.

  76. Hank

    You and Montana need to sort things out between you in private. These rants are getting a bit embarassing for those not involved.

    And you are probably right about NapK - I was uncomfortable with it.

    But I don't know any of the back-story because I have been awol for a while, and I am pretty sure there must be more to it than meets the eye.

    Now having said that, you have not been averse to giving people a good kicking yourself when you have felt like it, have you?

    And you only seem to pop up to have a go at people these days, which is such a bloody shame because you are a really funny, intelligent poster and the main reason I came over here in the first place was because you were banned on CiF and I missed your posts.

    Can't we all draw a line and start again?

  77. @medve - sad and strange how few posts there are on the UT tonight. No?

  78. @BB - I have never given anyone a kicking that didn't deserve it.

    I've never joined in a kick-in just because I had bigger blokes around me. I think that Montana's assault on NapK was out of order.

    As for Montana's attack on me, well, I'm crushed. I've not slept since. I'm close to agreeing that Georgina Henry is the finest website editor outside of Iowa.

  79. Hi Hank

    I wasn,t happy with the way NapK was treated here
    last night.And i hope he,s OK and is able to reflect
    and recognize that he wasn,t blameless.There was a
    degree of provocation from him.However i agree with
    you that the 'kid glove' approach should have been
    used given his circumstances.

    I also agree with BB that you and Montana need to
    sort out your differences and do it privately.
    Maybe i,m wrong but i do feel that the unresolved stuff between you and Montana-which is none of my business so i,m not taking sides-is actually holding UT back.I liked your posts on CIF and you,ve probably forgotten but we did have an interesting brief one-off 'converstaion'soon after i joined UT.So i hope you,ll soon become a regular poster on UT again.

    Anyway hope all,s good with you.Take care mate!

  80. .."One of the reasons I started giving this site a swerve was deano's self-indulgent meanderings, where he only returned to tumescence when a female poster passed through...."

    No problem with self indulgent meanderings it being largely true.

    Sadly no tumescence when a female poster passes through though.

    I am waiting for the old cock to be reamed out till then the medication required to have a piss renders the tackle dysfunctional.

    Still I can dream.

    Idle flirting is a lubrication to a civilised life not an aide to masturbation in my case our kid.

    Of course if my manner were to cause offence I would desist for the truth is I do like ladies and have a great respect for feminine perspectives

    I guess some might consider me a social service if I help keep you away Hank but truth is I share BB's old respect for you.

    I'll tell you what - I'll happily do a billip and voluntarily leave for good if only you will stop being a cunt and stop the bitter bile and start posting intelligently again??

    Deal or no deal young man?

  81. deano

    Oi UT needs both you and Hank so no offers like
    that eh!

  82. Hi Paul - how's it going?

    There's no reason why the "unresolved" stuff between me and Montana should present a problem to anyone else on here. There's nothing unresolved between us.

    Just as there's nothing unresolved between me and scherfig.

    who gives a shit either way? This site should be able to survive for what it is, and not just because it provides the occasional voyeuristic thrill when me and montana/scherfig lock horns.

    FWIW, Paul, I used to care about both of them. As much as anyone cares about another poster thousands of miles away.

    But that was all a long time ago.

    And now, well, fuck the pair of them.

    We've all been let down by people.

    The distance at which they live matters less than the closeness you felt them to be.

  83. Hello all

    quick look a posts - not stopping. Looking for onfo please.
    Has anybody else seen strange light in sky ? Came in - very high - from W- NW about 5 mins ago. Moved across sky and then stopped - burnt out and disappeared . Looked like something burning.

    Anything about space debris coming down ? Very odd - bright orange like a ball of flame .

    Night all.

  84. Hank:

    @medve - sad and strange how few posts there are on the UT tonight. No?

    I suppose the number of posts will increase by one and possibly more if i ask you what you really mean by this.

  85. @deano - yeh, you and BB are both here cos I am, or used to be. You're here because I'm here. Apparently. But now you're here, you're just, well, here. I didn't invite you here. Nor did I ask you to stay here if all you're gonna do now that you're here is to be here.

    Do something, deano, other than ramble. Offer a little bit beyond being a randy old drunk.

    I saw your little ramble the other day about me. Grow up, deano. Take responsibility for yourself. You might have turned up here because I was here, but you're here now in your own right. So grow up, stop blaming me for being either here or on Cif, and stop wanking on about your fucking dog or Frederick Furnival.

    If I inspired you to do anything, for fuck's sake, at least let me know that I inspired you to get angry.

  86. @medve - good question. +1.

  87. It's coz Sunday night's bath nite, innit!!

  88. Hi Hank

    What i meant to say was that you,re obviously not
    happy with the way things are.And Montana has stated
    that she,s not happy either.So all i,m saying is
    that maybe you both need to sort things out
    privately.That,s all.And hopefully if you can both
    can come to an understanding you,ll start posting
    'normally' again on UT.Anyway it,s none of my
    business and as i like both yours and Montana.s on-line personnaes i don,t want to be seen to be
    taking sides.

  89. Hi Paul

    Montana's not happy because she's not yet managed to get sponsorship from nike and microsoft for the site.

    I'm not happy because I've yet to achieve world domination.

    We both thought that this site was going to be a springboard for world domination. We were both wrong. It's not surprising, in the circumstances, that we're blaming each other, hating each other, trying to kill each other.

    Thankfully, I've got a heroin habit, so don't take anything too seriously.

    As for Montana, well, I think we can all agree that decaffeinated coffee can't arrive in Iowa too soon.

  90. This comment has been removed by the author.

  91. We all have our roles in life Hank - could well be that I was angry before you got your first wind at the business.

    You should understand that many UT contributors these days are more sophisticated readers than your good self. They are well capable of scrolling on by and simply ignoring all that they do not wish to engage with or comment on. And that includes that which is boring, rambling or plain old disagreeably farty.

    It does not concern me if I am passed over or even derided. It happens often. If my tedious commentary provides an occasional smile or reply I am well pleased. If not, no matter.

    It's called no more than fatuous banter in some quarters. But there are occasions when I engage more if I feel I have something of value or interest to contribute.

    I have no need for a central role in UT - it was never my intention to be any other than a bit player, a simple supporter and an appreciative fan.

    You should recognise that Montana listened and tried to respond to what people like you and Scherf said - FFS she provided UT2 so that there was whenever the demand arose a forum for serious and continuing discussion/debate.

    She also had the wit to recognise that if the continuing rationale of this place was to be founded on unmoderated free speech then tossers like me and thee would simply have to be tolerated. And that an amount of inconsequential chatter and noise would be inevitable.

    I've been here for over a year now and I've never seen or read anything to indicate that you or Scherf have been discouraged from posting on or initiating a discussion on any topic you want here or on UT2.

    Your not happy with the place the remedy is in your pen my young friend.

    Don't let your epitaph be bitter and sour middle aged drunk - your worth more than that so don't let your anger blind your eyes and deafen your ears.

    With a little learning and humility you might regain a title of witty and thoughtful Sage.

    Dreadful news though, is that, even without your regular contribution UT goes from strength to strength and keeps on attracting new and thoughtful contributors.

    My sense of identity is not reliant on acidic use of language nor fulminating at the perceived failings of other UT's. Frankly I consider that worse than wanking with the lights off. Far too Catholic for me.


  92. Paul

    Big sloppy kisses, sweetheart xx

    I used to write killer posts a long time ago, when I thought it mattered. I'm not sure it matters anymore...

  93. James:

    It's coz Sunday night's bath nite, innit!!

    Very true: about to take the plunge myself!

  94. Deano30: well said. I only contribute when I think I have some thing usefull to say. Right now I don't other than having just watched "Capitalism a Love Affair" and wondering how I might sleep on it and post some sense tomorrow!

  95. Hi Hank

    Matters to whom?

    It does matter, I have sent my adult life putting sticking plasters on some of the casualties of our society - after they were saved from drowning. Someone has to go upstream and find the wretches who are throwing them into the river .

    Problem is - once we identify them what do we do with them and how? That is the crux of the problem. Many are predicting riots in the street soon - so be it. But riots are not a social revolution and are unlikely to start one.

    So - we keep on applying the plasters, providing the crutches both for others and for ourselves.

  96. This comment has been removed by the author.

  97. @deano - you bore the fucking hell out of me. You, your dog, and your alter ego Frederick Furnival. All three of you bore the fucking hell out of me.

    Conversely, you signed up to Cif because you enjoyed Hank Scorpio's contributions. Shit, man, who wouldn't?

    Hank Scorpio was some kinda fucking great poster, the Johan Cruyff of Cif...

    I'm just grateful I saw Hank posting...

  98. Leni: You are beginning to reveal to me where your some of your wisdom is coming from.

  99. @Leni - I really don't know, Leni. I'd like to see blood on the streets, but I think we both know who's blood will be spilt.

  100. Hank Scorpio

    If you tell me to fuck off and mind my own business
    i will-

    Tell me why is it that whenever you post on UT most
    people here welcome you with open arms?You might
    not realize it mate but you,re UT royalty whether
    you like it or not.So fucking sort out your issues
    with Montana and start posting here again.

    Most people here like you man!Gotta problem with

  101. Hey, Leni, and Paul, and medve...

    ...I'm not the Messiah, I'm just a very naughty boy (-:

  102. Life is an unequal business Hank - you never bore the fucking hell out of me. You, my dogs and Fred Furnivall all three delight and amuse me.

    Hank Scorpio sadly was a short sighted poster on CiF - if he didn't see the ban coming he was nuts. If he did see the ban coming he was careless not to have copied and archived his many great contributions.

    Had he had the wit to archive then many others could later have seen the quality and sharpness of his wit. To give the enemy total control over your output is not only nuts it's naive nuts.

    I may need me cock reaming but Hank may need his wit and wisdom channels de-coking.

    Life was ever thus. I am indeed delighted that for a few months I did see Hank posting.

    He was better then than he is now. He was class. Cruyff went onto make a continuing contribution when his playing days were over why don't you Hank?

  103. Hank

    No one said you,re the fucking messiah and trust me
    you ain,t the only 'bad boy' round here.

    Glad you,re sense of humour is still intact.

    Sort things out with Lady M and then start being
    the Hank Scorpio most people here know and love.
    And when i 'kick off' next please remind me of my
    own wise words.

    @Evening Leni

  104. Evening Paul

    Hank is certainly no Messiah ! No St. Francis either.

    Angry and frustrated yes - this I understand. n a single case basis anger can be a positive motivator- can direct anger where it belongs and sometimes effect change.

    The mess our society is in takes me beyond anger. So many legitimate targets the anger is diffused into droplets to be blown away like a shower of rain.

    Political action against injustice will be supported only by the poorest plus a very few - although they are many they are only a small - and divided - section of of the community. There is a huge buffer zone in the middle who will side with the establishment for fear of losing what they have. They believe the false promise of jam tomorrow and are foolish enough to buy into the political rhetoric about hard working families and British values - without ever asking themselves just what those values are or what exactly it is they are supporting.

    Some have opted out and just keep their heads down and get on with it.

  105. @deano - when Hank Scorpio got banned from Cif, all the posts I ever posted on Cif got deleted.

    My archive got wiped out.

    It was heart-breaking.

    I'd put a lot into those posts. I'd worked hard, I'd not only put heart and soul into them but I'd also done research.

    And all I got on here, on the UT or on Cif, was fucking idiots telling me that morally I was in the right. Heh, who cares about that?

    You, deano, tell me that you got inspired to come over here because I got banned "over there". BB says the same, as does PCC.

    It's no fucking consolation to me to be honest when you're all free to post on Cif, and even more so when the Tories are in power and the GMG continues to cheat on its tax bill.

  106. Leni

    It is sometimes very difficult to seperate your own
    personal anger with the anger you feel at the
    injustices in society at large.Most of us have demons
    of one sort or another.Sometimes they actually drive
    us to make good whilst other times they can destroy
    us.It,s a bit like kids who were abused.Some grow up
    and do whatever it takes to not subject their own
    kids to the same tratment.Whilst others grow up to
    subject their own kids to the same abusive treatment.

    Life is a tough call for many people and i don,t
    know all the answers.As i,ve said to you before i
    personally get so frustrated when i think about
    stuff because i invariably end up banging my head
    against a brick wall.Sometimes it,s best not to
    think too much.But if we don,t think we too often
    accept what is bad and unjust.Thinking can put you
    on a vicious cycle.Hope that made sense.

  107. Hank

    If you want to post again on Cif why don,t you
    e-mail them and convince them that you,ll play
    the game.Doesn,t mean you have to sell out.Just
    be smart enough so you may get moderated,even
    pre-modded but you won,t get banned again.

    It may take time and you may have to make some
    compromises but if that,s what you want i don,t
    see why it can,t be achieved.

  108. @Leni and @Paul -

    - you're sweet kids, leni and paul. We'd like to buy you both a Coke, blah blah blah, in perfect harmony....

  109. Hank

    You can post on Cif under a new name. The loss of your archive must hurt. You write well - very well in fact, but you know this and I,m not here to give you platitudes or plaudits.

    Write some serious political analysis and submit - if not to the Guardian - to other papers. we need some new thinking , a challenge to the establisment and the status quo and we need it in mainstream outlets - blogging has a value in that something you read may provoke thought but the discussions tend to be contained within a small circle.

    Get off your bum scorpio - do what you do best and bloody write something. Grrr!

  110. This comment has been removed by the author.

  111. Less of the 'sweet kids' dismissive stuff too .

  112. Fcuk it! I,ve deleted again.

    Hank-you,re headed for a cyber slap man.Either e-mail
    Cif and do whatever it takes to return as Hank Scorpio
    Or re-emerge under a different name but don,t make
    it too obvious that it,s the banned 'Hank Scorpio'.
    There,s always a way back if you want it.

    btw i,m not a sweet kid so less of that matey.And if
    you,re offering fcuk the coke i,d prefer a glass of
    good red.

    What,s your problem with accepting that many people
    just happen to like Hank Scorpio and what he stands
    for.You,re no messiah but you,re no fool either.Get
    posting bro.

  113. Sometimes Hank I wish you lived within walking distance - don't like public rows but right now I'd like to shake you.

  114. Stop it guys!!!

    HankScorpio might have been a legend, but wot about scherfig?

  115. I very rarely post on CiF these days and have no desire to do so whilst MAM remains as poster of the year.

    Hank as you know other banned posters have gone back and even now are developing well supported persona.......

    If there was anything that you especially wanted to say on CiF with a HS label attached you could always post it here first, I think there are probably several here who might be prepared to copy it and post it with the opener.............

    As my comrade/friend/fellow poster Hank Scorpio might well have said "........................."

    Nothing in the rules to prevent indirect direct attribution to Hank Scorpio, you simply need a few friends

    You now have atomboy's CiF watch to park a copy on if you fear a moderation or deletion.

    If you have something of quality that you want to say let us know.

    Anyway it's good night all from me

  116. Hank

    You know why - you're winding the handle of the barrel organ again - preprogrammed tunes.

    It's not other people who are the problem.

  117. Not charisma- self concealing miasma

  118. Leni

    I,ll hold him whilst you give him a good slap.
    Then we,ll have a group hug.

  119. Oooh, a group hug xxx

    Hank, Montana, Paul, Leni and scherfig xx

  120. No hug from me.
    Night Paul.

    Night Hank - Write something.

  121. @Leni - I get bored easily. What would you like me to write about?

  122. Nite Leni and Hank

    Hank you,re a sarky bastard but i mean that in a
    caring way.

    Seriously though it,s been good talking to you
    and as always with you Leni.

    Take care x

  123. Hank

    To start with - I would like you to write about your solution to our messed up society - to instruct those of us who flap around with our oars out of the water going nowhere.

    Political and social solutions which will solve all problems. No can do ? No - neither can I.

    Failing that you could try an imaginative journey towards a solution - an in search of an answer. You can write it in any style you like .

    Write dear Hank about whatever it is that drives you. What do you mot dislike - what are the forces which drive us - collectively - to form and then tolerate unequal societies, why are we submissive to authority, why do we rant internally ? Write about why you are bored - is it with yourself, your job, other people, an unfulfilled ambition or because you are afraid of your dreams and hopes. Wy do you - or we - need a target to aim our arrows at? Why do some people live as though there is always sunshine and roses round the door? Write about something that matters to you - really matters I mean - beyond ideology- into your own reality.

    The scorpio persona is only a small part of you - there are other places beyond the bounds of Cif.

  124. Hank

    Research and write about the history of sociopolitical ideas - examine why every theoretical step forward has so often been subverted to ensure that societies always produce a ruling, privileged elite.

    That can be Chapter 1