16 June 2009

Daily Chat 16/06/09

In an odd little P.S. to the War of the Roses, the Battle of Stoke Field took place on this day in 1487. Abraham Lincoln gave his famous "A House Divided" speech to the Illinois senate in 1858. In 1963, Valentina Tereshkova became the first woman in space and during the Soweto Uprising in 1976, police opened fire on a peaceful protest of 15,000 students, killing 566 children. Celebrating birthdays today: Dame Eileen Atkins, Joyce Carol Oates, Lamont Dozier and Cobi Jones. It's Bloomsday wherever there are fans of James Joyce.

71 comments:

  1. Ah now you see, Abraham Lincoln, there was a president. Went to war over States' rights, steered a skillful course twixt reaction and enlightenment, hard in war, generous in victory...

    Fine appreciation of the English language as well.

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  2. WTF, why can't we comment on WDYWTTA?!?!?

    That just takes the biscuit!

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  3. Happy Bloom’s day to y’all, but especially thaumaturge (coz her name’s apparently in Ulysses) and scherfig (coz he pointed that out to me – got a page, or at least a chapter reference for that, BTW?)

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  4. @andy:

    Thauma's name crops up in Gene Wolfe's Urth trilogy as well (or tetralogy if you count the fourth book as part of the same cycle).

    I'm a big fan of Gene Wolfe, me.

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  5. “or tetralogy if you count the fourth book as part of the same cycle”

    Doesn’t everyone? ;-)

    Thoughts on last night, Swifty?

    Were England “beaten by the rain”, as Andy Bull argues, or did Chanderpaul and Sarwan have something to do with it?

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  6. Care to expand on that, thauma?

    You’re not having sex at 10.30. in the morning, are you?

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  7. Dot - that is just too effing weird! Since when have they ever closed off a WDYWTTA thread? They just archive it and start a new one, don't they?

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  8. @andy:

    Re. the Urth cycle - tricky one, really. The first three are obviously "of a piece" and share the same narrative arc, while the fourth happens once Severian gets to the Phoenix Throne and sets off for Yesod. Or something.

    Re. last night - you can't argue with Duckworth Lewis, I'd have taken the win quite happily if it had been us... the only real issue is wickets, in my mind. The Windies could afford to fling the bat a bit, they'd need to have lost 10 wickets in 8 overs, but D/L does take this into account I think, so all in all the Windies go through, no use crying about it now.

    Not really that fussed, to be honest, 20/20's boring anyway.

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  9. Andy - just getting into the spirit of Bloomsday. (I only wish.)

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  10. Montana,

    The previous one's still open, methinks the summer work experience student from Oxford pressed the wrong button....................

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  11. andy, here's your Joyce reference, it being Bloomsday and all that. My brother's working in Dublin at the moment so he'll probably be up to something today.

    Thaumathurge is Greek for "wonderworker". In James Joyce's Ulysses, in the "Ithaca" chapter (ch. 17), among the accumulated papers in Leopold Bloom's (locked) drawer is an advertisement for:

    "The Wonderworker, the world's greatest remedy for rectal complaints, direct from Wonderworker, Coventry House, South Place, London EC., addressed to Mrs. L Bloom with brief accompanying note commencing:
    Dear Madam.
    Quote the textual terms in which the prospectus claimed advantages for this thaumaturgic remedy.
    It heals and soothes while you sleep, in case of trouble in breaking wind, assists nature in the most formidable way, insuring instant relief in discharge of gases, keeping parts clean and free natural action, an initial outlay of 7/6 making a new man of you and life worth living. Ladies find Wonderworker especially useful, a pleasant surprise when they note delightful result like a cool drink of fresh spring water on a sultry summer's day. Recommend it to your lady and gentleman friends, lasts a lifetime. Insert long round end. Wonderworker.

    Were there testimonials?
    Numerous. From clergyman, British naval officer, weelknown author, city man, hospital nurse, lady, mother of five, absentminded beggar."

    And so on and so on. In plain English, you shove it up your arse, and it helps you shit. Some of Cif's writers could use one of those.

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  12. scherfig - thanks. I feel all dirty now.

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  13. scherfig: YOU are the wonderworker mate.

    Since I’m having a quiet day at home after the panic of the last few weeks, seems like a good opportunity to dig out Ulysses and read the appropriate chapter.

    See you in a couple of days...

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  14. My copy of Ulysses was in the box of books that got ruined last summer in storage in someone's basement. My copy of A Confederacy of Dunces was in that box, too. Not that I've ever read either book. I's too stoopid.

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  15. Montana - no idea where my copy of Ulysses is. Nor am I bovvered. Once was enough.

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  16. @thauma:

    I tried it as a precocious 15 year old, and that attempt cured me forever.

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  17. Have never even considered giving Finnegan's Wake a go.

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  18. 'I feel all dirty now.'

    If you read Joyce, and don't feel dirty, then you you're not doing it right. :o)

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  19. I tried to read Joyce and felt (as mentioned above) stoopid.

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  20. Thaum you dirty devil...


    "TF, why can't we comment on WDYWTTA?!?!"

    I tried, its not taking comments. God knows what they're up to.

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  21. The WDYWTTA thread is now officially open again ...

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  22. Thank god for that. I was getting well het up.

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  23. Ahem, can I draw your attention to Bea Campbell's thread? It's a corker, could be a classic in the making...

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  24. Oh Swifty. Thank you for that. By. Gum.

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  25. Good spot, Swifty.

    What WERE they thinking when they published that?

    Unless it’s to draw the flack from Mrs Seaton...

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  26. Who IS Mrs Seaton? I'm expecting a name like Genetra Flenderbicks or Mowena Forgan-Mithbasket like all the other Cif pseuds.

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  27. It was beautiful to be reminded of Kang. Haven't watched the Simpsons since it became crap. But Kang and Kodos. Happy days.

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  28. I like the way Bea has to tell us all about it, because it's crashingly obvious no one else has noticed.

    "Why I accepted my OBE" rather presupposes the question "Why did you accept your OBE?" which, as far as I know, has never been asked. A simple email to her friends and co-workers would've sufficed, surely (if they'd been asking and that's a big "if"), rather than write an open letter in the Graun, surely?

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  29. Ooh. Didn't notice Bea Campbell's thread. I will take a shufty.

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  30. Heh, yes. Another obvious question is "you are who, exactly?" A Molly Sugden moment, to be sure.

    And who IS Mrs Seaton?

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  31. Where were you yesterday Fencewalker?

    Mrs Seaton is Anna Shapiro who had a simply marvellous ATL piece published all about the Bronx Zoo.

    Do check it out – it’s an absolute delight ;-)

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  32. Oooo I'm so excited. All these bounties in one day!
    There goes getting any work done.

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  33. "No, No, No," I said. "I love women, not men."

    I wonder if her husband knew that when he married her?

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  34. "No, No, No," I said. "I love women, not men. And yet, I find you strangely masterful..."
    It's like Mills & Boon.

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  35. andysays

    A hundred thousand thankyous for the pointer to Bonkers Bea's guide to Gonging. Tears are streaming down my face. Put out an APB for Bitterweed please.

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  36. I would have suggested Bender but that'd get me kicked off CiF.

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  37. I'll do it Fencewalker

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  38. You have my ringing endorsement.

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  39. “BeatrixCampbellOBE
    16 Jun 09, 5:36pm (8 minutes ago)

    I say, you peasants are awfully rough. You rabble should learn some manners when addressing your superiors. I have an OBE you know”

    Brilliant!

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  40. This is going down in the annals.

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  41. Swifty, I think we all owe you a beer for this. Every few minutes I just spontaneously giggle now.

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  42. Excellent thread. She must have realised she had it coming, otherwise she wouldn't have blogged about it in the first place (unless, of course, it was just to show off... hmm..)

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  43. Hmm

    Can't get onto the Graun site atm. Anyone else having problems?

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  44. OBE thread closing now - less than three hours. What was Bindel's record?

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  45. BeatrixCampbellOBE16 June, 2009 18:59

    andysays, my profile has had posting rights withdrawn. Indubitably this is a tremendous slur, not only on my person, but on Britain, Empire and All. I shall protest to the Queen.

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  46. What a fucking muppet that Campbel's turned out to be

    Didn't she used to be a proper feminist ??

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  47. Staybrite, hey there, Bitterweed is unfortunately in pre-mod...

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  48. Fuck theyr'e closing it for the night. Damn and bollocks.

    @ BeatrixCampbellOBE

    ;-)

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  49. BeatrixCampbellOBE16 June, 2009 19:09

    Bitterweed, one does not wink at a lady, it is considered vulgar in polite society.

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  50. BeatrixCampbellOBE said...

    Bitterweed, one does not wink at a lady, it is considered vulgar in polite society.


    I hear the Little Britain David Walliams "I'm a laydeee" voice when I read that! LOL :o)

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  51. BeatrixCampbellOBE16 June, 2009 19:14

    BeautifulBurnout, levity does not become a lady of principled gravity such as myself.

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  52. BeatrixCampbellOBE16 June, 2009 19:37

    BeautifulBurnout, you may address me as Ms Campbell, OBE, rather than Ma'am, I like to be thought of as approachable. A curtsey is not appropriate either, the OBE establishes our proper position with respect to each other, overt displays of deference are not necessary.

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  53. SwiftyBoy,

    Sorry, it was you who gave the alert, not andysays. Many thanks.

    Bitterweed, ahh, I did wonder.

    Does anyone else think "Community Mod" is an odd phrase? I just keep picturing Nerys Hughes riding the country lanes on a Lambretta.

    Mind you, that's an ongoing issue...

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  54. I take it AllyF is already writing a response?

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  55. It's better than wanking at them surely.

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  56. Staybrite, yes Bitterweed had a bit of a meltdown at various people after the Euro elections. Got personal with a few fuckwits, mostly above the line.

    Oh well...

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  57. Damn! And I missed all the fun...

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  58. Damn! Finally get the broadband back, after havnig to tell BT to swap out their ATM Mux, just in time to miss out on suggesting Dr Zoidberg.

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  59. Zoidberg's always left out.

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  60. BeatrixCampbellOBE16 June, 2009 20:33

    Fencewalker, why would AllyF respond? One does not respond to an OBE, one corresponds with an OBE. Vulgar louts and boors respond, refined and polite people correspond.

    That AllyF is awfully working class though, good manners do not come natural to that man. I do hope he will be gracious in his writing.

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  61. I cant believe i was too late to get a comment on Bea's unspeakable effort today. I need to get in tomorrow after my exam, dont let them close it!!!! 3 days!!! it must be 3 days!!!

    This one really will go down in the annals, i have never read the likes of it.

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  62. http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/8103535.stm

    that cheered me up

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  63. As I pass from here to obliv - i thought I mite stall to say my sisters Edie 's sfinal do was class.

    Deano30

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  64. BeatrixCampbellOBE

    #one does not wink at a lady#

    Indeed, I am currently reading a book regarding horse breeding, and it is the lady who winks at the stallion. Once her tail has been lifted.

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  65. Deano - many commiserations. Sounds like you have a lovely family and that you will all help each other.

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  66. Thaum - I need to talk 2tu bout Kerouach but not 2 day.

    You use the language so well - thus I must say well class.
    I am trying to write a poem the essence of which is:

    ..............the space in which your tits hung.................

    is that offensive to youngish girls of your club?

    Your views of me are sadly but ......insigifna .....ok.......................but far .......from conclu..............

    with warmth lots of love an d a veery very drunk Deano

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  67. Deano
    Take it easy, my commiserations chap.

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  68. @ bw




    cheers comrade - now so aresed ratted can't get the bottle to me mouth/arse.

    what descontuted funn .

    I like the way u use/disabuse our languge.

    Best W deanoo

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