07 September 2010

07/09/10

Cortina d'Ampezzo, 1906  

How my achievements mock me!
-William Shakespeare

202 comments:

  1. This was in the spam folder when I went to put today's thread up. Seems a shame if it were to go unread because it wasn't there last night when it should have been:

    RapidEddie said...

    How high should the bar be on moderation? Only two instances should merit it - outright libel and unqualified abuse.

    So "you're a cunt" should get deleted.

    "You're a cunt because..." shouldn't get deleted as long as it goes even half-way to establishing its case.

    A mod should be able to discriminate between calling the author into question and calling the article into question."You're fucking stupid" should be deleted. "Your article is fucking stupid" or "Your viewpoint is fucking stupid" shouldn't be.

    Nothing should be moderated because because its unpleasant but true. Pulling a number of out my arse just to contentious, if someone says that 90% of muggings in London are committed by black males, it might be an underpinning or justification for racism, the poster might be an obvious racist, but if it's factually correct, it stands. No exceptions.

    Nobody should be banned/premodded for complaining about a deletion. That puts a questioning of moderation judgement up there alongside outright abuse which, even to a 20-something Oxbridger in skinny jeans and on not very much money, should be an obvious nonsense.

    It seems to me that the more sensible starting point when a mod gets an itchy trigger finger is what disqualifies it from deletion, rather than what qualifies it. As more than a few people have pointed out, at the moment if you just report a post - any post - the mods just appear to delete without reading.

    My money's on no perceptible difference in the quality or frequency of modding. Natalie might be sincere and enthusiastic in her intentions, but she's basically got a bunch of monkeys being paid peanuts enforcing the policy. They'll delete according to their own prejudices.
    07 September, 2010 00:04

    ReplyDelete
  2. And, Joe had a great birthday. He thought it was cool that you all wished him happy birthday. Said you all must be nice people.

    ReplyDelete
  3. BBC Radio4 7.07AM and again now - new research results say ME /CFS - caused by virus . I thought that was already established but ah well .

    " Not a disease of the mind ...."

    ReplyDelete
  4. Good morning alle welt!

    Happy birthday Chrissie Hynde, Peggy Noonan, Michael J Feinstein, Cüneyt Arkın and Elizabeth Tudor, (and everyone else who shares the same day), wherever you may be.

    Okay, back on the chain gang.

    ReplyDelete
  5. And happy birthday to the Blitz as well.

    70 years' young today, bless.

    ReplyDelete
  6. morning all. glad to hear Joe had a good birthday!

    am confused now - thought strike was yesterday. if it's today, the trams will be on reduced service and it's sodding raining. humph.

    ReplyDelete
  7. arse.

    "des perturbations sont attendues, ce mardi 7 septembre 2010, sur l’ensemble du réseau TaM.

    Le détail de nos prévisions de circulation sera disponible dans la journée de lundi 6 septembre"

    clearly the person updating the TAM site is on strike as well...

    ReplyDelete
  8. Swifty Boy

    Ah yes The Blitz which some say bought the British people together in a way that has never been achieved since.And where the Home Front was defended by the likes of the RAF and these wonderful guys

    ReplyDelete
  9. Said you all must be nice people.

    Little does he know! ;-)

    Glad he enjoyed his birthday.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Not to worry, Philippa... in a striking show of trans-Manche solidarity, there’s a Tube strike here in lovely London Town today, and according to large swathes of the British media last night:

    THE WORLD WILL COME TO AN END (except in the rest of the UK which is utterly unaffected and indifferent…)

    ReplyDelete
  11. @BW:

    …God this country is fucked...”

    Not as long as I’ve got my new favourite drop D tuning, it isn’t. I was farting around playing some Nirvana songs last night, and realised I could play almost their entire output in it, indeed for some of their songs you have to be in that tuning. So move over open G – there’s a new boy in town.

    By God, with the power of drop D, we’ll take back this country, one power chord at a time.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Brought even -not bought.Well it's early!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Tried DADGAD SB ?

    You will be Jimmy Page playing Kashmir...

    ReplyDelete
  14. Wot about the taliban tuning?

    BAGDAD

    (Joke, it's pretty useless, unlike...)

    CGCGCD which is a belter!

    ReplyDelete
  15. @BW:

    Yes mate, I’ve messed around with DADGAD and use it occasionally when I’m doing the Irish stuff, but I get a bit tired of jumping in and out and back to standard tuning.

    Drop D’s just easier, and it means I can pick/strum “Heart Shaped Box” and other faves without awkward contortions…

    @turminder:

    LOL.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Loads of Nirvana stuff is in that irritating tuning one semitone lower than standard, really bugs me... Sorry, thats my guitar gripe for the day.

    ReplyDelete
  17. @Jay:

    The Velvet Underground did that as well – my ill-fated foray into finger-picking Venus in Furs meant de-tuning by a semi-tone across the neck.

    I tend not to bother though, most people wouldn't know the difference if you were playing out, I’d only really do it if I was playing to a backing track or indulging in a spot of “play-along-a-Nirvana”.

    ReplyDelete
  18. turminder
    also lol

    JayReilly/SB . Stevie Ray V used to do it. He was an extremist in pursuit of the perfect tone though... Nirvana were just junky scum (discuss)

    ReplyDelete
  19. Sifty/Jay,

    Chris Morris as Nirvana doing a pantyliner commercial 1m 22s onwards is the best piece of music satire ever until Fur Q doing 'Uzi lover' comes immediately after it.

    ReplyDelete
  20. "He was an extremist in pursuit of the perfect tone though..."

    For tone i always find Peter Green untouchable, big fan of Warren Haynes on the tone front too as it goes... I listen to a lot of SRV but never been that keen on his tone, in all honesty.

    ReplyDelete
  21. JR
    Apostate !!!

    Peter Green was such an articulate player; the guitar tone complimented his great phrasing perfectly. He could sing damn good too - heard Fleetwood Mac's Love That Burns ?

    I can't do music links form work but check it out. That guy was pretty amazing, as you say.

    Forken tragic when you think about it...

    ReplyDelete
  22. Ah I miss The Day Today, I was watching This Morning with Richard Not Judy the other day and that was bloody good aswell.

    What do we get now, Would I Lie To You, its not good.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Duke
    will check that out tonight - thanks !

    ReplyDelete
  24. Back later, work piling on now...

    ReplyDelete
  25. @BW:

    Junky scum… I imagine they’d probably have taken that as a compliment, to be honest. SRV is a whole different kettle of heroin, though.

    @13thDuke:

    I’ll save that for lunchtime. And as we’re riffing in the key of Chris Morris… saw that “Four Lions” the other day. He’s not lost his touch.

    @Jay:

    Joe Satriani hits some pretty pure highs, if we’re talking about tone. Classically, gurning Julian Bream is about as good as it gets for me. And for country, Brad Paisley’s gear is mighty well set up.

    ReplyDelete
  26. BW

    I know i know... SRV is always raved about for tone, and im a huge fan of SRV, prob have more of him on my ipod than anyone else, just dont like that tone of his. Well, sometimes i do, certain bits and pieces. Pure heresy, what can i say...

    ReplyDelete
  27. Mind you I'd have pumped myself full of scag and written reams of post-metal suicide notes too If I'd had to knob that talentless loudmouth skank from Hole. (Discuss)

    ReplyDelete
  28. @BW:

    LOL, she speaks very highly of you as well, mate.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Mind you I'd have pumped myself full of scag and written reams of post-metal suicide notes too If I'd had to knob that talentless loudmouth skank from Hole. (Discuss)

    and with an ulcer, as if things weren't shit enough....

    ReplyDelete
  30. For the sake of clarification for those pursuing MSc Gender, I would also include in the group "talentless loudmouth skank": Russel Brand, Carlisle, and most of ITV.

    ReplyDelete
  31. @Leni: got your latest e-mail. Many thanks, some great ideas and alternative interpretations, which was just what I was looking for.
    Only had enough time to skim through it but I'm sure it will come in useful later.

    ReplyDelete
  32. The new system on Cif has thrown up some interesting statistics. Who has posted most in the last 3-4 years? Who has contributed faithfully and relentlessly to the phenomenon that is Comment is Free? Whose sheer quantity (if not always quality) of posts on every subject under the sun might give them a shot at Commenter of the Year? Here are some contenders:

    AllyF 9,000 comments
    Kizbot 10,000
    LordSummerisle 11,000
    MoveAnymountain 12,000 (*current title-holder!!!)

    But there is a clear front-runner - step forward MartynInEurope with a staggering 18,000 comments in just three years!

    ReplyDelete
  33. Nirvana-my tuppenceworth.

    I was never a fan really, grunge wasn't my thing and if I never hear 'Nevermind' for a thousand years it will still be too soon.

    However, in an industry full of phoneys and stylists, I believe Kurt Cobain walked the walk and talked the talk. He genuinely was all about the music.

    His disgust with the mainstream success of 'Nevermind' led to In Utero which is still an astonishing album in terms of it supposedly being a mainstream release. It's almost unlistenable (with the exception of Heart Shaped Box and All Apologies) and an enormous 'fuck you' to the record company and bandwagon jumping fans. All pluses in my book.

    Additionally (for me) he was a huge champion of the Glasgow indie scene of the time- Teenage Fanclub, Captain America, BMX Bandits and especially the Vaselines whose Jesus don't want me for a sunbeam he covered on MTV unplugged.

    He was troubled, fucked up etc etc but never a phoney.

    So although not a fan of Nirvana, I do believe he was the genuine article in terms of musicianship, credibility and his belief in what his music should be.

    ReplyDelete
  34. @BW

    Oi, leave Russell Brand alone and stop lopping bits off his first name!

    By Carlisle, do you mean Belinda?

    ReplyDelete
  35. that's about 1 comment every waking hour non stop....for nearly 1100 days......and still to say something of value

    ReplyDelete
  36. statistician 11.49 -- GIGO !

    ReplyDelete
  37. SwiftyBoy ...

    Julian Bream is about as good as it gets for me.

    Retired now. Williams is still in there, although he usually plays a bit too fast for my liking, but still a maestro. His interpretation of Córdoba is great IMHO.

    ReplyDelete
  38. deano

    I think you are being a little harsh.

    The other day, he said: "FWIW LOL."

    He even put in some punctuation marks to make a little face.

    So, about 18 000 posts to hit that peak, that pinnacle, that acme of achievement.

    All downhill now, though.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Oh, thanks a lot, frog .. mate! ;-)

    Still seems like a loada aulda bollox, though. Par for the bollox course around here isnm't it. Like people wouls really give a shite about who posts, what number of times, on a forum ELSEWHERE. Sad man, just sad! And sad is for loozers! That's statistically proven, too.

    ReplyDelete
  40. @Duke
    He was all of those things, fair comment

    @Spike.
    No, he's a jabbering attention seeking ponce. Sorry.

    And when I said "Carlisle", I meant of course "Wales". Sorry for this error; I have sacked my intern.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Haven't seen him post here lately though.

    He seems to have mastered the delete button without understanding that he could happily use it for everything he writes and there would be no discernible loss to human knowledge or understanding.

    ReplyDelete
  42. Thanks for the numbers statistician

    ReplyDelete
  43. @deano:

    Et tu, Brute? What’s with the CiF-erati bashing, always had the impression you were a bit above that, old chap?

    @Atomboy:

    He’s nicked my catchphrase? I’ll fucking marmalise him.

    @MartynDeCordoba:

    Oi! You nicked my catchphrase, you thieving sod. (PS FWIW my dad has always preferred Williams to Bream, but I’ve got to say, having seen both live, Bream (at the Wigmore) was the better player – quite a feat when you consider Williams’ undoubted mastery of the instrument. LOL)

    ReplyDelete
  44. Frog - was it you who mentioned the little Grey Ferguson tractor the other day (in response to leni's lament at her lost tractors)........if so was it the duel fuel model that was fired up using a more volatile starter fuel? ....(Paraffin? or somesuch)


    MartynIE - if true that's quite a record!

    If you still lived in Wales I guess the sheep would have been pleased. (I jest)

    ReplyDelete
  45. Meanwhile, news just in...

    It seems that Martian was so keen to attend a concert he imagined was being held in the fundament of one Natalie Hanman that all which can now be seen of him is one foot sticking out of her backside.

    ReplyDelete
  46. SwiftyBoy

    Where's the little punctuation face?

    All the kool kidz use them on Costa del Geriatrica.

    Oh, fuck it.

    Anything is better than this...

    I'm off.

    ReplyDelete
  47. SwiftyBoy

    Yes, AFAIK, and this is just MTCW, I much prefer Bream's style of playing, much warmer, less rushed. IMHO and FWIW(TM SB). I tried to play the Villa-Lobos (Homage to social life) prelude #5 at JW speed, it wasn't good. Bream's interpretation is much more of my thing. LOL ROFL and all of that TTFN

    ReplyDelete
  48. @El Cordovan:

    True – flash technique does not always great music make. I’ve a recording somewhere of Yehudi Menuhin and (I think) the Berlin Philharmonic performing The Four Seasons, and, undoubted virtuosity aside, it’s just too damn fast.

    ReplyDelete
  49. Swifty - temptation got the better of me....the sight of numbers often sends me off into calculator mode. A sum without a comment always looks kinda lonely (and that' me excuse).

    Without the CIF-erati my life would be less .......something or other. I stand in awe/amazement at their achievements and I do have a genuine affection and regard for some of the activists on there.

    That said I still consider MAM a turd!

    ReplyDelete
  50. Martyn actually no digs at anyone there, including the waffle on waddya with CiF comments is yer actual apples and avocadoes stuff.
    Hi Deano Mine's a little grey petrol Fergie, revolutionary kit with the 3-point hitch which sold hundreds of thousands here too. A lot of my older friends learned to drive on them and have fond memories of the " Petit Gris ". The TVO model started on petrol and switched over to paraffin when warm, never sold here afaik.

    ReplyDelete
  51. @deano:

    I know mate, but really, it’s “fish in a barrel” stuff isn’t it? Clearly, many round here will disagree, but I can’t just can’t get that het up about what the good, bad and indifferent folks of WDYWTTA get up to BTL, frankly.

    It’s the vacuous, entitled, neoptistic, vanilla, mocha-supping, villa-owning, artisan-baguette-chomping hypocritical fuckwits like Rusbridger, Toynbee, Bindel and all the rest of their fellow-travelling gaggle of wank stains who really get on my wick… that is, of course, when I think of them at all.

    LOL.

    ReplyDelete
  52. @Swift

    my dad has always preferred Williams to Bream

    Me too. I've never really been into fish, but you get a lovely bit of crackling on a spit-roast archbishop.

    ReplyDelete
  53. Just read Natalie Hanman's response to the notion that CiF has a narrow range of identity politics views represented. She can't see a problem. I'm now officially changing my forecast from 'minor tinkering' to 'no fucking difference'.

    ReplyDelete
  54. @Spike:

    ”…a spit-roast archbishop…”

    Eww. Poor Rowan, that’ll teach him to stay in the Meridien when the Chelsea players are in town. Honestly, one little glass of communion wine and the rest’s just a horrible blur.

    ReplyDelete
  55. RapidEddie
    No surprises really then are there... same gaggle of priviledged fuckos in charge, same set of anodyne / deleted responses.

    ReplyDelete
  56. @Swifty

    I hadn't seen it from that angle. An awful mental image...

    ReplyDelete
  57. @Spike:

    As generations of Westminster choir boys have no doubt joshed:

    Where’s the altar candle, Archbishop?
    Yes, it does rather, doesn’t it, Chief Chorister…

    ReplyDelete
  58. "How my achievements mock me!
    -William Shakespeare"


    Montana - since I do read here everyday I ought to make myself useful ......I think you used the above Shakespeare quote on Sept 1st!!

    ReplyDelete
  59. @Swift

    I forget who posted this one, but I enjoyed it.

    A small Irish boy is crying by the side of the road and man takes pity on him. "What's wrong?" he asks.

    The boy says "It's me Ma. I just found me Ma dead in bed."

    "Oh bejaysus" the man says. "Do you want me to get Father O'Riley?"

    The boy replies, "No thanks, Mister, at a time like this sex is the last thing on me mind."

    ReplyDelete
  60. "It’s the vacuous, entitled, neoptistic, vanilla, mocha-supping, villa-owning, artisan-baguette-chomping hypocritical fuckwits like Rusbridger, Toynbee, Bindel and all the rest of their fellow-travelling gaggle of wank stains who really get on my wick..."

    That's a big wick you have Swifty - long may you keep it trimmed our kid.

    Frog - I too learned some of the finer points of driving on a grey Ferguson.... Quite an engineer old Harry was.

    laters all

    ReplyDelete
  61. @deano:

    Cheers old man, I’m away too, can’t sit here slagging the crows off all day long, I’ve got stuff needs doing.

    ReplyDelete
  62. This Graun Sean Connery article reminds me of a brilliant Connery anecdote. True as well.

    My brothers mate won a competition for a round of golf at the über-exclusive Loch Lomond golf course a few years back.

    After the round my brothers mate and the bloke he was golfing with went into the club bar for a drink. It was empty apart from two blokes at the bar, one of whom was Connery nursing a whisky and smoking a pipe.

    My brother's mate gets talking to him, has a couple of drinks and being a bold lad says to Connery- "So come on Sean, there must have been a lot of women eh?"

    Connery replies all the while smoking his pipe- "puff, puff, puff. Urshula Andresh. puff, puff, puff. Up the arsh".

    ReplyDelete
  63. Incidentally, I will rip out my eyeballs, dip them in hot cheese fondue and eat them if I have to read the following one more time on Waddya or the People's Panel:

    Commenter: How about an article on world hunger?
    Jess: We had one of them recently.

    Commenter: How about an article on global conflict?
    Jess: I believe that was touched on recently.

    Commenter: How about an article on man's inhumanity to man, the decline of Western civilization and the end of times?
    Jess: I think Bidisha kind of covered that in her article on monster trucks.

    Commenter: How about an article on the prevalence of diabetes amongst lesbians in Inuit tribes?
    Jess: Gosh you're right, that sounds fascinating. I'll put a few calls in to Jules, Bidi, Barbara, Bea, Cath and Laurie to see if we can get a range of opinions on it.

    ReplyDelete
  64. Eddie,

    Personally I think they should have a people's panel on whether or not there should be a people's panel discussing things about people but in a panel format where they discuss the feasibility of asking everyone on how CiF can be improved biannually. On a people's panel type forum.

    ReplyDelete
  65. RapidEddie, there is no need to parody the procedure, it's really much worse than that. This is an actual recent 'you tell us' exchange;

    Zounds: "Anyway one speech in particular really got a standing ovation and lot of support since - I thought it might be the sort of thing that would be interesting to have on here"

    JessicaReed: "zounds - that's a good speech indeed. I might just drop him a line when I have a minute."


    And here is the opening of that speech:

    My name is Jamrat Mason and I have a vagina. I'm involved in East London Community Activism but today I'm here to speak “as a trans person” about transgender issues. The term “transgender” is a broad term that refers to to a massive spectrum of people who in some way veer away from the gender written on their birth certificate. So, I cannot, in any way whatsoever, be representative of transgendered people. I can only talk about the world as I see it, from where I'm standing, as a transexual.

    I'm a lucky tranny.....



    No doubt there's a Cif article on its way as we speak.I'm not sure that very much will change under Cif's new leadership.

    ReplyDelete
  66. anon,

    "My name is Jamrat Mason and I have a vagina."

    Must. not. make. obvious. joke.......

    ReplyDelete
  67. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  68. Anon, not only is there an article from Ms Jamrag on the way, there will be an alternative perspective on Ms Jamrag's vagina from Natacha, who will blame the government for the dilapidated state of Ms Jamrag's hand-crafted lady-bits. Or something.

    ReplyDelete
  69. Must. not. make. obvious. joke.......

    Or, typo.

    ReplyDelete
  70. Just clocked Matt Seaton trying faux-modesty on that Hanman thread:
    "I wouldn't have called my tenureship very successful"
    I don't think too many would.If the site's had any merits, they've come despite,not because of him.

    ReplyDelete
  71. Jamrat Mason - The LadyBoys from Brazil ?


    AlisdairC
    I read the Stewart Motha thing. What on earth is he doing professoring in law with arguments like that ? Shit.

    ReplyDelete
  72. Any reason for you arguing for *more* moderation on that thread, Martyn? Seems a very strange request. What comments is it you'd like to be censored?

    ReplyDelete
  73. Hi Leni

    Dunno if you're around but tonight on Sky News at 7.30pm there's a programme called 'A Town Like Merthyr' looking at the consequences of 30 years of political failure on the town of Merthyr.

    Merthyr has the distinction of having at 25% the country's highest proportion of working aged adults claiming disability benefits.(The national average btw is 7%).So ConDem plans to overhaul the benefit system are going to hit that community especially hard.

    ReplyDelete
  74. "But there is a clear front-runner - step forward MartynInEurope with a staggering 18,000 comments in just three years!"

    only 18,000?...feels more like 18 million

    ReplyDelete
  75. mind you..once you've read one...

    ReplyDelete
  76. Hi Pul And everybody

    don't have Sky tv but there have been countless reorts on the problems in Merthyr.

    It is a drab place surrounded by council estates.

    Over the last 30 years industry has declined - the Hoover factory finally closed a few years ago.

    A massive amount of investment will be needed to bring the place alive again - not just in terms of jobs and infrastructure but in confidence and skills building in the people.

    If you listen to people from towns like Merthyr you will hear a lot of anger and a feeling of being trapped. Several of the valleys communities were artificially created - simply to provide workers for the coal and steel industry . (George Borrow describes te old Iron works on Merthyr Top like 'the fires of Hell' )

    Many of these areas went from being small agricultural villages to townships very qickly - peopled by many immigrants from the English industrial towns,Ireland, Italy and elsewhere.

    It is easy to demonise the people from these towns - and many do - but they are abandoned populations. More than jobs go when local industries are closed as 'no longer economically relevant ' - this label is also applied to the people. Simply - they become Not Wanted.

    Makes me angry.

    ReplyDelete
  77. "only 18,000?...feels more like 18 million"

    Clear the aisles, please Ladies and Gentlemen.

    ReplyDelete
  78. @alisdair

    I could see everyone, from Spike to PeterBracken being able to pick bloody great holes in it.

    I'm not quite sure how to take that.

    ReplyDelete
  79. Spike, take it the Urshula Andresh fashion.

    ReplyDelete
  80. Spike, just meaning that it's such a load of shite, bizarrely both wanting to deny autonomy to those who want it (something I think you'd oppose) to also covertly putting Sharia law on an equal footing with domestic law (something I'm pretty sure PeterB opposes).

    ReplyDelete
  81. ”…Spike, take it the Urshula Andresh fashion…”

    …which brings us neatly back to Archbishop Rowan, Ashley C and John T in Room 417, some time in the wee small hours after the VIP bar has tipped out at Mahiki’s.

    ReplyDelete
  82. Oh well..I'll try that again...pt 1

    Martyn in Europe..the Western Hemisphere..Planet Earth..The Solar System..but mainly inside that smug and cosy self-loving bubble in your head where you can pretend you aren't the flappy little inadequate that everyone else sees

    Nice post on changes thread...

    "I think there are a number of things that are unacceptable in debate, and which should be censured:

    1. Attacking the person (for what they represent, for what they say, for being ATL, or for just existing)
    2. Attacking the person and not the opinions
    3. Attacking the opinions based on some personal facet .. e.g. "Oh, you would say that, as you holiday in Tuscany", "what gives you the right?", that sort of thing.
    4. Indirect speculation, e.g. "people like you would drown kittens".
    5. Bullying and gratuitous abuse of other people, whether ATL or BTL

    Everything that is unacceptable in a civil, face-to-face forum of debate and discourse, should be unacceptable on-line as well.

    CiF shouldn't give people the license to behave like badly socialised dingos, which of course it does not do right now, and I suppose it never will."

    any thoughts on telling people to fuck their mothers?...dying of bowel cancer?..

    it's just that you seem so keen to wipe out needless abuse...really keen, in fact..so keen, we have...

    "Considering the wealth of opportunities and means to criticise ideas and articles, it's not really necessary to opt for personal abuse, snide innuendo or general nastiness and bullying, as if they were reasonable instruments of debate."

    ..so in addition to: boring, failed humorist, inconsequential, clique-loving, stupid and plain fuckin irrelevant..we can add...hypocrisy taken to stratospheric new heights

    ReplyDelete
  83. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  84. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  85. pt2..this is getting fuckin stupid...

    Martyn's so keen to keep banned posters off CIF, that he has decided to lobby for an IP ban..

    "I think an IP ban can be made more sophisticated by:

    1. Simply excluding known users from an IP check
    2. Delaying activation of new user registration from suspect IP addresses for 8 to 24 hours, etc.
    3. Textual analysis of certain comments from suspect IP addresses … there's a few regular posters here who could give some input on the automated spotting of regular trolls, especially on I/P threads.
    4. Keeping IP control tighter and registration confirmation period longer on conflictive threads"

    nice one Martyn...what's the matter mate..what you scared of?

    Is CIF a kinda sacred arena for you then mate?..this just a dumping ground?...you just nip over here to spill your bilious little grievances...not that I mind..obviously being told to fuck my mother is not exactly a life-enhancing experience..but it sure as fuck enhanced your posting...only half engaging thing you've ever written you fuckin little tool.

    Seriously Martyn...by some margin, you have to be the biggest prick I've ever come across on line...not one single redeeming feature.

    Don't bother responding mate...I wouldn't want to be responsible for forcing you into an abusive post..I know how strongly you feel about that kinda thing.

    ReplyDelete
  86. "3. Textual analysis of certain comments from suspect IP addresses … there's a few regular posters here who could give some input on the automated spotting of regular trolls"

    .."a few regular posters"?..anyone in mind?...you trying to set up a waddaya vigilante patrol?

    "Miss!!!..Miss!!!..it's a troll!!..I've never seen them on here before...and they said my post was silly and boring...and they said Bru was talking shit Miss...it must be a troll..that's what a troll is isn't it?...someone who doesn't think I'm very interesting or clever?...I thought that was the definition...well that's what Bru told me Miss"

    ReplyDelete
  87. CIF Top Trumps

    Posts 18000

    Recommends 25

    Credibility 0%

    Special Powers Sleep Inducing Skills

    Humour Tries hard

    ReplyDelete
  88. Just read more on that thread, Martyn. Responding to this comment:

    "More moderation please. Especiall against the arse wipes who constantly bicker about moderation. As soon as they complain moderate think about it no one will know.

    The beauty of it will be 90% of the complaints will disappear think about it we can then concentrate on the issues raised by the article."


    You replied,


    "I agree, and for the reasons you stated in your comment."


    Im genuinely interested to know, why are you so keen to have people censored? What is it about people disagreeing with you that you find so intolerable? I really struggle to understand how anyone could call for *more* censorship at a place like CiF - as most posts recognise, the modding is already completely over the top.


    ?

    ReplyDelete
  89. I knew Bracken reminded me of someone. The resemblance is absolutely striking.

    Arnold Rimmer

    ReplyDelete
  90. evening all.

    [pfffffffff]

    turns out strike wasn't very strike-y at about midday when i was oing to work, but it's gone full-on strikey now. so am not fully compos having just had to walk for an hour in crippling humidity to get home.

    so excuse me if i'm being dumb but - there are commenting stats? is that real or a windup?

    because if it's real, i'm having that dataset and making a dashboard using shiny new work BI product.

    PS - Jen - if you miss the day today, ttry Listen Against on Radio 4. bloody hilarious skit on BBC tokenism on tonight's episode...should be up here in a bit

    ReplyDelete
  91. Jay Reilly to Martyn

    Im genuinely interested to know, why are you so keen to have people censored?

    Seconded.

    It does seem strange seeing as had Martyn written on CIF what he wrote here, his feet wouldn't have touched the ground.

    Martyn

    Personally I don't think that I post differently here than on CIF (other than I'm a bit freer with my language), but you clearly did. Do you think that anyone can lose the plot occasionally, and you were lucky that it wasn't on CIF (in which case you should understand other's problems with moderation), or do you calculate how far you can go?

    If it's the former, I can't see why you're calling for heavier moderation. If it's the latter, then I find that a bit worrying - it's like saying you let loose here because you can...

    ReplyDelete
  92. I had to do textual analysis for me english a-level.

    fecking boring.

    how is working out desdemona's sodding motivation going to help cif?

    ReplyDelete
  93. PhilippaB,

    I had to do textual analysis for me english a-level. fecking boring.

    With spelling like that, I trust you failed?

    how is working out desdemona's sodding motivation going to help cif?

    It isn't Desdemona's motivation you've got to worry about (she wasn't a real person) - it's Shakespear's motivation for creating her that's interesting...

    My guess is 17th century wet dream fodder....

    ReplyDelete
  94. Hi All

    Jay, you heretic. How dare you impugn the legend that was SRV? Have to somewhat agree with the Duke in that Cobain strived for purity of sound, but I would not own any Nirvana albums. Cacophonous.

    Montana, been in the REI store, but not had breaky at the Mecca. You have us thinking about it now though.

    exiled and Jay--Thirded on the question. To hell with moderation.

    ReplyDelete
  95. Thanks for the tip Philippa.

    Did anyone see the 'I hate Richard Dawkins' article in the arts section of Cif today?

    What's next 'Christopher Hitchens is a nobber' in the cookery section.

    Weird start to Natalies reign.

    ReplyDelete
  96. I'm sorry Boudican, its a seriously heretical view but just never quite got to like that tone, though i love his playing. What can you do...

    ReplyDelete
  97. Just kidding Jay. Our tastes are indeed individual.

    ReplyDelete
  98. No need to apologise, its a genuine thought crime, its akin to sullying the name of The Baby Jesus ;)

    ReplyDelete
  99. Earlier someone mentioned the Sky program about the town in wales that has the highest no of Incapacity Benefit in the UK.

    I saw a report on Sky News about it earlier, they are concentrating on the open cast mine that offered a job to 80 jobseekers and only 5 took them up on it, except it wasn't a job it was a training course (in Business Admin) that might have lead to a full time job.

    On the bright side they are following one man who moved himself to Cardiff and got a job, which is nice.

    Not sure but they might have a bit of an agenda.

    ReplyDelete
  100. Wow that was an especially badly written post, sorry about that.

    ReplyDelete
  101. Hi Jennifer

    Not sure but they might have a bit of an agenda.

    I know what you mean. I look forward to Sky news' next expose which will be a week long investigation into corporate tax avoidance, the inner machinations of the banking industry and the way in which Govt is manipulated by media organisations.

    They are just sensationalising other people's misery to create a wholly false narrative that it is feckless people that have ruined the economy, in the process doing the Govt's dirty work for them.

    I detest Sky news and everything it stands for.

    ReplyDelete
  102. Natalie Hanman said this:

    Thanks very much. Would love your thoughts on what we're doing well and what we could do better ...

    Unfortunately, apart from being clumsy, clodhopping and about as subtle as screaming through a megaphone, it tells you most of what you need to know.

    Translation:

    We want to be told how brilliant we are and how the trajectories of our wonderful careers can reach ever more glittery levels of stardom.

    We do not want to hear about problems - geddit, scum?

    We want to institutionalise the cuddling and stroking of our prize fuckwittery and for those who fall into line, there will be prizes.

    So, who scurries to be given the job of milk-monitor, who races to be the straightest, stillest and tiptoe-tallest in the queue?

    It is all about membership of a cult for misfits and the socially inept.

    For those who have been banned from CiF - even when they go back occasionally or often - the thrill is never the same. The glamour never works the second time around.

    For those who depend on CiF like a drug, who need to think it gives them an audience and credibility, the fear of being cast out means they will do anything to penetrate the inner circle of Seaton or JezzeBella or Hanman or whoever hold the keys to the inner sanctum, where the blue stickers are kept in drawers and there are meetings where whispered debates decide who is moving up the ladder of sycophantic success and who has tripped and is barking their shins and getting their legs trapped between the rungs as they bump back to the ground.

    If Hanman said people could have a red sticker if they "helped out" by reporting people for disagreeing with the ideologies of the site and they would be emailed with instructions of who and what should be removed from the site, she would have a queue a mile long.

    If you are going to create a cult, the best people to recruit are people who are desperate to belong to something, anything as long as it will take them.

    Beyond that, they do not care and do not want to know. They certainly do not want to be questioned about their motives or methods or exactly what they have got themselves into in their headlong rush to belong.

    Like all cults, the members never think, as they wander in the mansions and grounds which their extorted money has bought, that they will end up committing mass suicide or be shot by the paramilitary.

    CiF will not change and because of this, it will fail. The point will come when the world simply runs out of idiots desperate to belong, but with nothing to offer.

    ReplyDelete
  103. It was fine, Jen.

    On the issue of tone, i love Warren Haynes cos he gets such good tones out of anything he plays, like:

    This, with a Les Paul.



    With a strat.



    And this I love, with a 335 (i think?), skip to 5:00

    ReplyDelete
  104. Jay, that's excellent. Warren Haynes is a great underappreciated talent. Overshadowed by the brothers public lives?

    ReplyDelete
  105. I think you are wrong Atomboy, the world will never run out of fools who want only to belong.

    I should know, I am one. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  106. jen

    Did you see my post from a day or so ago about my own cult?

    Welcome aboard!

    PS Red sticker in post and email list on way. (Hush, hush!).

    ReplyDelete
  107. Hooray I am saved!

    ReplyDelete
  108. Yeah, whatever.

    Now, that just leaves the payment.

    Would madam prefer the send a blank cheque or the send credit card details along with keys to house and car method?

    ReplyDelete
  109. Bloody hell, I can't even join a cult because I am skint.

    ReplyDelete
  110. Not sure really, Boudican, he seems to slip under the radar for some reason, he always comes across quite a humble bloke, not flashy, just gets on with what he does, nor is he particularly "presentable", sort of chubby hillbilly look, but he plays so well. Shame he doesnt get more recognition.

    ReplyDelete
  111. You know you are buggered when cults are saying 'well you're not really what we are looking for'.

    ReplyDelete
  112. We are quite happy for you to steal things or sell elderly relatives - the grandmother market is quite buoyant under Mr Osborne's excellent stewardship.

    We do not seek to place moral qualms or considerations as impediments to trip you up in your sprint to success.

    If you believe in it and want it hard enough, you will find a way.

    Or we can simply send the boys round.

    ReplyDelete
  113. "If you are going to create a cult, the best people to recruit are people who are desperate to belong to something, anything as long as it will take them."

    good point

    I can't find it but I'm sure it was Umberto Eco on fascism who described that class of timorous but vindictive citizens who seek strength in numbers and when push comes to shove will always side with authority and established order...it only actually takes a small number of actual fascists as long as you've got a critical mass of small minded malleable weasels who'll always toe the line and seek approval from 'above'...and then there's the type who's so keen to impress they'll actually want to join in...see if they can't instil a bit of order themselves...gain a bit of influence...wield a bit of power...for once in their sad little puff, 'earn' some 'respect'..cos they sure as fuck can't manage it by 'speaking their mind'...especially when they declare others to be 'fascists'...which in this context is synonymous with..

    'troll': n: person who does not agree with a flabby little boring cunt on the interweb.

    ReplyDelete
  114. That's a very good comparison with a cult. (Yes, I did make the connection but in a narrower sense.)

    But, like, Jen, I think there are plenty of people who will want to join it.

    (Speaking of cults, am just reading the Mormon marriage thread. The really horrifying part was the link to 'sister-wives'.)

    As for guitar tone: Santana, surely?

    ReplyDelete
  115. MF - you've just described my next-door neighbour, who is (obviously) pissing me off lately. Yer classic net-curtain twitcher, always ready to do someone in. Anyone.

    ReplyDelete
  116. Grr

    like, Jen, should read like Jen. I have not yet succumbed to valleygirlspeak.

    ReplyDelete
  117. oh, but, like, thauma, chill, yeah? i mean, like, whateverrrrrrr.

    or something.

    have just booked trip back to blighty! oiseau has never been to london. imagine this will involve lots of walking around and looking at stuff.

    can't wait.

    ReplyDelete
  118. Turge

    Yeah i am quite partial to a bit of Santana...

    ReplyDelete
  119. christ - am wishing i'd stuck to the hainanese stream i started watching the footy on. because the al jazeera english language channel is peopled by pundits who make Vari's guinea pig look like an erudite student of the game.

    at least venables is missing.

    ReplyDelete
  120. Philippa - does the trip coincide with one of our meet-ups? I believe BW has mentioned first weekend in Oct in Northampton and his gig in Leamington around the 7th of November (the Sunday - can't be arsed looking at calendar).

    ReplyDelete
  121. "MF - you've just described my next-door neighbour, who is (obviously) pissing me off lately. Yer classic net-curtain twitcher, always ready to do someone in. Anyone."

    So when did you move to Spain then?

    ReplyDelete
  122. exiled ...

    ... do you calculate how far you can go?

    Fair question, and in a word, Exiledlondoner,yes.

    I also know that my comments are not only read solely at CiF. Would I deliberately place a comment to cause a reaction elsewhere? According to my most ardent critics clearly a valley boy from Merthyr's Caerffili, like me, just wouldn't have the imagination, scope or the intelligence.

    Here´s another one ... ;-) LOL

    ReplyDelete
  123. thauma - argh, are coming 25-30 october (french half-term*, cheapest flights) so looks like missing both of them...


    *she works there, ok. no digs.

    ReplyDelete
  124. Somebody called ifitsasix posted this link on waddya earlier today - it was deleted within minutes.

    website

    ReplyDelete
  125. monkeyfish

    So when did you move to Spain then?

    Oi! I haven't even got net curtains...

    ..that's "original wooden shutter twitcher" to you, and well, if she will sunbathe in the buff...

    ReplyDelete
  126. Damn, Philippa, you'll have to do better next time.

    MF - damn right, the bloke would be frothing over getting posts deleted.

    ReplyDelete
  127. Martyn

    Fair question, and in a word, Exiledlondoner,yes

    OK, that's sorted then.

    I also know that my comments are not only read solely at CiF. Would I deliberately place a comment to cause a reaction elsewhere? According to my most ardent critics clearly a valley boy from Merthyr's Caerffili, like me, just wouldn't have the imagination, scope or the intelligence.

    You've lost me - this is all part of some cunning plan?

    ReplyDelete
  128. anon

    Nice website ..thought I came out of it looking pretty cool as it goes...in a weird twist..I was indeed once 'monkeymagic'..and my monkeyfists do flash...spooky

    ReplyDelete
  129. "According to my most ardent critics clearly a valley boy from Merthyr's Caerffili, like me, just wouldn't have the imagination, scope or the intelligence."

    Dick for Brains

    These things I know...and, this being the internet...not just me..they may not bother telling you..but they know

    1) You are a vindictive little narrow minded turd

    2) You are thick as pigshit

    ..go back and look at your post..look at what you actually acknowledged...if you're not slapping your forehead thinking 'oh fuck' within 5 minutes...you're even thicker than pigshit.

    here's a clue 'stupidboy'

    So you gonna do the decent thing and ban yourself?

    ReplyDelete
  130. Philibee,

    "how is working out desdemona's sodding motivation going to help cif?"

    Not in the slightest - don't think I've seen any Desdemona types over there for ages. Now if you want to look at what motivates bullshitting, devious, manipulative bastards, an understanding of Iago's actions comes in handy.

    ReplyDelete
  131. Evenin' all

    Curtain-twitchers can have their uses. I used to leave my door unlocked when I lived in France, safe in the knowledge that if anyone tried to burgle the place, the neighbours would have polaroid photos and DNA samples off the burglars by the time they left...

    Shopping people, on the other hand, is shitty. Unless it is that Majority Rights nutter who infests every thread about "Johnny Foreigner" with his vile rantings. I freely confess to shopping him. He is a disgusting piece of shit disseminating lies and hate-filled bollocks wherever he goes.

    ReplyDelete
  132. Martyn,

    Any chance of a response to my query?

    ReplyDelete
  133. thauma,Santana has lovely tone. Here he is with some say the best picker alive.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yKo0FK6-O-E&feature=related.

    ReplyDelete
  134. exiled ...

    You've lost me - this is all part of some cunning plan?

    Nah! Intentional, but not so cunning. Though, it certainly seems to get to some people, dunnit?

    ReplyDelete
  135. JayReilly

    Martyn,

    Any chance of a response to my query?


    What I write on CiF usually lacks all transcendence. Put it this way, I know I'm being "curtain twitched" and I willingly obliged.

    I assume Moderation will continue as before, or may even change, but not thanks to any ideas that I may have placed.

    ReplyDelete
  136. monkeycunt: I am not going anywhere.

    ReplyDelete
  137. heyhabib - nice analogy, hehehe.

    now, who's Caliban?

    ReplyDelete
  138. Here's a slightly younger Buddy Guy with Big Mama Thornton - what a voice..... makes you wonder where it comes from?

    Hound Dog

    ReplyDelete
  139. exiled--Very good, find myself listening and watching more and more of the older stuff. Partly due to this site. Most of the new music won't do for me.

    ReplyDelete
  140. I can't post Big Mama Thornton without giving a nod to the greatest blues singer of them all.

    Bessie

    ReplyDelete
  141. Boudican

    Very good, find myself listening and watching more and more of the older stuff.

    I hope the Bessie Smith is old enough for you - 1927? Quality is great for the time - probably a measure of how big she was at the time.

    I don't really bother listening to newly released stuff - there's so much that has stood the test of time which I've yet to hear.

    ReplyDelete
  142. Hound dog was amazing exiled, thank you exiled, the sound was excellent.

    I wonder how Big Mama Thornton would fare on X factor.

    ReplyDelete
  143. Martyn

    What I write on CiF usually lacks all transcendence. Put it this way, I know I'm being "curtain twitched" and I willingly obliged.

    Now you really have lost me. You wrote that stuff to monkeyfish because someone else was watching?

    ReplyDelete
  144. Can I be Sir John Falstaff?

    ReplyDelete
  145. exiledlondoner:

    I guessed (but I didn't know for sure)that my "moderation" posts on CiF would make far more ripples here than anywhere else. On CiF my comments probably barely registered with the vast majority (as usual), and certainly not with anyone at The Guardian.

    ReplyDelete
  146. Jen

    I wonder how Big Mama Thornton would fare on X factor.

    I'm not sure it's exactly what Simon Cowell has in mind...

    One last one - Etta James - then I'm off to bed.

    ReplyDelete
  147. exiled

    I am just imagining Mama Thornton being told she had real potential (but could she lose the weight) by Simon Cowell.

    I like to think she would have smacked him one.

    ReplyDelete
  148. Martyn

    I guessed (but I didn't know for sure)that my "moderation" posts on CiF would make far more ripples here than anywhere else.

    Of course they would - you're in a fucking flame war with monkeyfish....

    On CiF my comments probably barely registered with the vast majority (as usual), and certainly not with anyone at The Guardian.

    But we didn't ask you why you posted them - we asked you why you thought that moderation should be made tougher...

    If you're saying that you just wrote that to test people out, then good for you - you fooled us all.... and wasted our time in the process...


    I've got nothing against you, but this all seems a tad pointless?

    ReplyDelete
  149. spike - great stuff, am starting a list.

    Doll Tearsheet, snyone?

    ReplyDelete
  150. Hi Boudican/exiled

    A few years i discovered Donald Byrd.See what you guys think of this this track

    ReplyDelete
  151. I've got nothing against you, but this all seems a tad pointless?

    Of course, I believe the true nihilist may wonder about the point you are making, what point would anyone be making?

    ReplyDelete
  152. exiled:

    No, I don't actually think that moderation should be made tougher (well, maybe they could so something about the surfeit of right-wing trolls at times), and I do think that moderation should be made fairer, and more lenient.

    I think the fact that CiF Forums are run by and for a business, rather than an independent community, is also a major factor governing the policies of moderation, and how they are implemented.

    ReplyDelete
  153. I am dubious anyone needs to hook anyone else on drugs. Trafficking young women is a myth in this country. And economic migrants do not live in servitude. So it seems to be a pile of fetid dingo's kidneys to me.

    MAM on the new Freedland thread .

    ReplyDelete
  154. Actually, my biggest mistake (which lead to this current meltdown) was in not realising early enough that I was being flamed from a number of angles. Maybe if I had identified that in time, I would probably have reacted differently. CiF moderation is bizarre, but it also provides a coddled environment, where threats of flaming are kept much lower. IMHO It's easy to fall into the trap of thinking that this is the norm for all political/news/chit-chat forums.

    ReplyDelete
  155. Paul - very cool! like that a lot.

    not normally one for jazz, but think that's often due to the vocal stylings - that's got a real swing to it.

    do you know much about soweto kinch? want to take an interest but not sure where to start. this is a bit noodly for me, for example.

    happy had money on AJ again. that 4.75 is going to come in right handy.

    ReplyDelete
  156. "monkeycunt: I am not going anywhere."

    ..and up your own arse excepted, you never have.

    ReplyDelete
  157. meanwhile, argentina beating spain 3 - 0, with some absolute peaches on the goal front.

    i love it when someone switches to another stream after the main match you wanted, and you end up watching something really cool!

    like last time - portugal v cyprus as a goal-fest follow-up to the bulgaria game.

    simple pleasures, aye, simple pleasures...

    ReplyDelete
  158. exiled: I'll admit it. I was flamed by two chumps, and fell for it. I'll just ignore them from now on.

    ReplyDelete
  159. PhilippaB ...

    meanwhile, argentina beating spain 3 - 0, with some absolute peaches on the goal front.

    It is a curious game. First goal, Messi (Barcelona), second goal, Higuain (Real Madrid) ... La Primera 2 : La Roja 0 ... Oh, and thord goal, Tevez (Manchester City).

    ReplyDelete
  160. Very good Paul. Had heard of him, but not familiar really. Not a big jazz guy myself, but tracks like that can lead me to listen to more of it.

    Philippa--Argentina looked far more aggressive on the attack than they did vs Germany in the WC. Spain resting on their laurels?

    ReplyDelete
  161. Nah! Intentional, but not so cunning. Though, it certainly seems to get to some people, dunnit

    Just because no one else knows what the fuck you're on about most of the time, doesn't mean you're clever.

    monkeycunt: I am not going anywhere.

    Oh, I don't know. Since you're such a fan of heavy-handed moderation, maybe we could make an exception and start deleting your posts.

    ReplyDelete
  162. boudican - i swear, i can't work out how germany managed to shut them down so much. in fact, don't really remember them shutting argentina down - they just started big and kept going - and kept the ball, course.

    there's a weird circular thing going on here thatt i can't get my head round.

    ReplyDelete
  163. that 'weird circular thing' being a concept, rather than an actual football.

    ifyouseewhatimean.

    ReplyDelete
  164. Good one Deborah . Our former CiF colleague GolemXIV gives more details on the mechanisms of the mega-transfer of public funds to the banks, and the mega-transfer of bank risk to all of us ...
    Meanwhile, in the US the big banks are getting even bigger by absorbing the collapsing Regionals .
    It's all going horribly wrong.

    ReplyDelete
  165. Oh go on then Martyn..give us the inside story of your cunning plan: you posted that stuff to..erm..cause ripples..make a bigger dick of yourself?..what's the payoff..for you?..or was it a 'charity' cunning plan?

    And I'm assuming as a respected 'C' holding member of the CIF community, you now sorta feel honour-bound to nip back and repost this...

    "No, I don't actually think that moderation should be made tougher (well, maybe they could so something about the surfeit of right-wing trolls at times), and I do think that moderation should be made fairer, and more lenient."

    along with maybe...

    "Let me unambiguously declare that earlier on in the thread I was 'in role' ...engaged in a cunning plan...to..erm...[insert appropriate reason]"

    you know it makes sense...'sword of British Justice' etc...Come on mate..some of your liberal public will hold it against you otherwise.

    and we can suppose your answer to Jay Reilly is "it was part of a cunning plan to [please explain the point of the plan martyn?..apart from exiled put the notion in your head]"

    ReplyDelete
  166. Montana Wildhack

    Just because no one else knows what the fuck you're on about most of the time, doesn't mean you're clever.

    Why should it?

    Since you're such a fan of heavy-handed moderation, maybe we could make an exception and start deleting your posts.

    Do what you want.

    ReplyDelete
  167. Montana

    Just because no one else knows what the fuck you're on about most of the time, doesn't mean you're clever.

    It certainly doesn't mean anyone is going to waste even a few seconds wondering about it, either.

    It's like a child saying: "Look, there's a leaf and then a pebble and then an empty tin and then a spider and then a puddle and then a dog's turd."

    You look and yawn and say, "Yes, that's right."

    The child has received the attention it craved but there is no hidden meaning in the observation it made.

    ReplyDelete
  168. The flaming troll avoidance system is ON.

    Have a nice day :-)

    ReplyDelete
  169. Hi Philippa

    Sorry i can' t help you with soweto kinch but here's another from Donald Byrd

    And correct me if i'm wrong but is this track more to
    your taste?

    Nite

    ReplyDelete
  170. Fuck me, it's like the bloke in One Flew Over A Cuckoo's Nest, who, when they are playing cards, just keeps grinning and squinting and saying: "Hit me, hit me!"

    ReplyDelete
  171. Oh, am I Anonboy, by the way, or is it the one who posts as anon/Luke/ifitsasix?

    If it's me and if this is going to develop into some kind of series or screenplay for a television/film adaptation, I like it already.

    So, two eggs next time, please, unless they're scrambled, in which case three is good, if we've got enough. Just a quick beat, milk, butter and loads of salt and pepper. Thanks.

    Cup of coffee would be good as well, please.

    ReplyDelete
  172. hehehehe. not heard much alex harvey - bit of a character, eh? oh, for that more innocent age...

    like that byrd one even better than the first one - the kind of thing that makes me wish i'd stuck at playing the piano...

    ReplyDelete
  173. I think you're Anonboy. My reaction when I saw it was a twinge of disappointment. I hadn't realised that 'Luke' was 'ifitsasix'. I always kinda liked 'ifitsasix'.

    Oh well.

    ReplyDelete
  174. Montana -- I was out of circulation when MAM got voted whatever it was, is it true it's a man ?

    For at least a coupla years now I only engaged with it on a sure-fire squashing certainty, where it was hopelessly out of depth, and then disappeared.

    My html accepted here but not on cif ...

    ReplyDelete
  175. atomboy! now, you have gone too far.

    milk in scrambled eggs?
    ewwwwww. goes all watery.

    what you need, pet, is three whole eggs, one extra yolk, well beaten, melt buter in saucepan over lowest possible heat, add salt, pepper, then eggs, and then cook, keeping them moving, scraping off the bottom of the pan as necessary, as long as it takes, until they are are the consistency of soft butter and yellow as a daffodil.

    takes about ten minutes but trust me it's worth it.

    ReplyDelete
  176. Cannot remember him/her, I'm afraid, Montana.

    Anyway, conking out now, so I'll leave you all to it.

    ReplyDelete
  177. Thanks, Philippa.

    Will try it. The milk is only ever about a small tablespoon, by the way.

    Sorry, sleepy now. Night.

    ReplyDelete
  178. "milk in scrambled eggs?
    ewwwwww. goes all watery."

    Melt a little bit of mature cheddar in it first, Phili!

    Do you mind if I explain a bit more about the Iago characters on CiF?

    ReplyDelete
  179. Teamteaching, it's called and his partner is Montana 'Mom' Wildhack. She injects a little all-American tough love into the lesson:

    "God I despise you, you little prick."


    Liked that one !

    ReplyDelete
  180. there's a couple of john of guant characters kicking around, think - all "this sacred isle, this England" and not getting it...

    so explicate away

    now paul's got me listening to donald byrd...

    ReplyDelete
  181. @Phil

    Not heard much Alex Harvey? The man came up with one of the greatest song titles ever...

    There's No Lights On The Christmas Tree Mother, They're Burning Big Louie Tonight

    Try his covers of Delilah and Next (Brel's Au Suivant in English), and Gang Bang, and Faith Healer, and Give My Compliments to the Chef, and, and...

    ReplyDelete
  182. frog

    Once in a rare moment of honesty MaM said he had a proposal of marriage rejected - happened in a carpark apparently.

    ReplyDelete
  183. Philippa

    'People else this Isle with Calibans' has been going round in my mind.

    ReplyDelete
  184. spike - will try, promise.

    am having that 'new perspective' album from byrd, though. great stuff.

    bit like will todd, who did a jazz setting of the latin mass - that i can't find on youtube...

    ReplyDelete
  185. right - midnight has passed, have work tomorrow.

    night all.

    ReplyDelete
  186. Think I see what you mean Philippa, but Argentina came out flat in a game which was billed as a grudge match after the fireworks postmatch in their previous meeting. Hard to figure from a usual world power in the game.

    Paul, liked the second D.Byrd better, but I am a sucker for key ticklers.

    ReplyDelete
  187. Leni -- we've had various moments of probable honesty from MaM, but I started mostly scrolling by years ago. So he's a 'he' then . Ellis was sure it was a woman quite a few years back now !

    ReplyDelete
  188. I was out of circulation when MAM got voted whatever it was, is it true it's a man ?

    Yes, it's true. I ploughed through a few old threads around that time because some people were claiming that MAM was female and I knew that I had seen statements to the contrary. Can't remember exactly the evidence was that I found (seems like it was something about men's groups that he'd belonged to), but I'd bet the farm that MAM is a man.

    ReplyDelete
  189. Ellis was sure it was a woman

    There's a much-missed poster. Did he get banned or bored? Or am I just not running into him?

    ReplyDelete
  190. Night Philibee, I was thinking and well, might as well post it, even if not read.

    The thing about Iago characters is, they have a deep dislike for anybody who is more successful than they are.

    They don't ever see a failure in themselves, in being second, or third, or 18,000th best, for that matter. No, it's all because of unfairness, in their eyes, and a belief that someone less deserving has had better treatment than they received.

    Also, these Iago types really do believe they are more intelligent than anyone else.

    "Thus do I ever make my fool my purse;
    For I mine own gained knowledge should profane,
    If I would time expend with such a snipe
    But for my sport and profit."

    So they encourage their lackeys while despising them.

    Ultimately, they get found out, but just for a while they have a moment in the sun.
    Just as if they were living in Spain.

    ReplyDelete
  191. Montana--I saw Ellis around on the economic threads, but seems as busy as ever... Voila.
    I don't know if it's me but there seem to be more and more threads coming thick and fast, or maybe I'm getting old ! Whatever, while I'm personally reading and commenting less, new "customers" seem to be piling in . Partly the Times paywall, but I have a feeling that more people are feeling uneasy by the economic situation , and are looking around for explanation. And not liking what they're finding.

    ReplyDelete
  192. I see "the french" are getting the "greek treatment" in the editorial on French Pension Reform.

    Not a hard figure in sight, a load of general statements about "the french", it sounded as though written by a Tory propagandist. Can't be bothered , fuck it .

    ReplyDelete
  193. From Bracken clone brooklynowes on Whaddya...

    And aren't you the one who's convinced that Bulgaria under the dictatorship of Ceauşescu, ("The Genius of the Carpathians")

    Bulgaria. Heheh.

    ReplyDelete
  194. @dave

    And it looks as if the Guardian now has a weakness for the fucking CFDT, the trade union confederation that's constantly cosying up to the right.

    ReplyDelete